Night Shift

thanks @Jacques......you write wisdon. I will take on what you write and pour energy into recovery of my son. Thank you

PP

Hello my friend @PeppiPatty

I am thinking of you and sending you hugs

instead of writing a letter to her, pour that energy into supporting your son and make him feel like he has people who care for him. -- I agree @Jacques

You are awesome @PeppiPatty, putting our children first is what we do xx

I will , thank you @Mazarita

I talked about it to my hubby and he said it is just the medication -- sometimes he takes half or double the medication

Been thinking about you , how are you today

I like the way you describe you mother as a wonderful woman but complicated. @Mazarita Once we have a few years on us we all get a bit complicated. My mother was too, but there were a few casualties. I guess it has become my life work to understand these kinds of things.

@Jacques is probably right in his advice to you. @PeppiPatty Put your energy and love into your son. He is young enough to be able to grow through mistakes and get a decent life. Your mother wont change too much anymore. Whatever the reasons she is as she is. That is the decision I made.There are ways to get through things. His health issues have been massive but I am sure you can weave a life for him .. like a tapestry. It will need his wants and traits and talents to be brought to the fore, bit by bit.

My son is not a star. The Othello role is just a one-off ... a rehearsed reading in a community group. I am not into star or Hollywood metaphors .. they make my shackles rise, but thank you, I know what you mean. I like him doing it as it gets him grappling with big ideas and acting with academics, teachers and actors while he has been a bit anti the education establishment. King Lear is the next big one and he will have a small role .. like I do in Othello .. I am Third Gentleman, a Musician and Attendant.

At the moment he is working as an accompanist with a young bass in the front room. My approach is to keep working and keep him working at things that interest him and have meaning. No money for him in this one, but a great networking experience. In accompanying you have to be good at being in the background, which is not how my son usually plays the piano, but I can hear him now and he is doing well playing Schubert and this singer is becoming a friend. Money comes with some things but shouldnt be the only reason we do things. Human motivation is best when it is multi-faceted.

Sorry @Appleblossom, i did not mean to offend you, i ment he is a star in your eyes, that he is special to you and thanks to you he will make a wonderful life in music, he sounds like he has many network connections already, and you are right, money should not be a motivator for doing things, we should all do what we love, that is partly what is wrong with the world, everything is done for someone else or done for greed.

@Appleblossom, i hope you give yourself a pat on the back, you are an amazing mum, the care and gentle way you push your son out into the world is fantastic, everything at his own pace, i wish their here more mums like you around. the world would be a better place 🙂

Jacques

Not offended @Jacques but value the opportunity to discuss and go back and forth and about a topic and just be me. It is just one of my hobby horses. I believe we have enough good will between us, and it is good to make me laugh at myself and not take it all too seriously. I can relax more and do that now my son is finally starting to get a life.

Maybe there is a reason for things and connections. We are all different, but maybe its good for others to witness our struggles and successes. He is on skype at the moment playing games and unwinding.

I am also trying to spread an idea of hope about schizophrenia. It can be very scary, but there may be ways to deal with it. Certainly in your current situation boundaries and personal space for you seem utmost.

Hi everyone. @Appleblossom @Mazarita Sorry I just disappeared but my computer broke and it took me ages to get it fixed. Look forward to catching up.

Hi @eth, welcome back! It's great to see you. Tomorrow I'm off down south for three weeks with little or no contact on the forum. Might be on and off here today. Look forward to catching up. Hope you've been travelling okay while away.

Thanks @Mazarita hope your trip is a success and you and your Mum enjoy each other's company. When I visit my Mum I find I just have to choose to take a deep breath sometimes and not challenge her like I did when I was younger. It's easier just to choose peace. And have a little time out from each other here and there. My Mum is quite eccentric, very hyper at times, and an evangelical Christian - she really can push my buttons but I've decided to comit to having a relationship with her after a long break and we've gradually become closer and more accepting of each other over the last few years.

You must be busy getting ready today - best wishes for a happy journey.