Night Shift

darling @Former-Member

Thinking about you...........

You sound very supportive to your sister..am so proud of you honey.......

@Former-Member and @Billamba and @Mazarita @Angel333 @Shaz51 @Jacques @Appleblossom

My real friends...night night beautiful people xx

Well its after 1am and I am wide awake.

Thinking thinking thinking. I can not function on no sleep. Why is it that I suffer from fatigue and at times insomnia. That is just some kind of cruel joke. I need to find a GP. I am so bloody anxious about finding a GP. History and all that. I hate rehashing it all. Going over all the stupid things Ive done. I need to get follow up work done on a nasty auto-immune disease that they think I have. That terrifies me. I already have one auto-immune disease. Its not a big deal but Im pretty noncomplient with it. I can feel a lecture coming on with that. What a way to start with a new doctor. Im honestly just a complete basket case.

Hi @SCORPION. Haven't been engaging much here over the weekend and just refound your post. I'm up once again in the wee hours too. People do believe a lot of different things. My partner is someone who is also fascinated by conspiracy theories. The hollow earth idea is like the Jules Verne novel, 'Journey to the Centre of the Earth'. Have you ever read that or seen the old movie?

Hi, i'm up too. Couldn't sleep and watching 'rage' while I'm posting. After a mostly slothful week last week I finished my sub-editing job yesterday! SO rewarding to do good work but I find it SO hard to discipline myself to 'volunteer freelance' work. It's difficult for me to do 'scheduled work' for reasons that I won't go into here, and I WANT 'scheduled work'. Nevermind. Nothing's perfect. Going to an art exhibition today and then to church! 🙂

Hi @Terry, good on you for finishing the sub-editing job. I also find it hard to 'schedule' but want to keep trying to do it anyway. I have an early morning walk and swim with a friend planned at 9am, I'm hoping I'll still make it. Sounds like good activities in the day for you ahead. Hope you enjoy.

Thank you. Yes, the document is a very inspriring one about putting your fellow man first as a christian. I have enjoyed sub-editing it. It's a beautiful time of day - dawn is breaking and 'rage' is on in the background. I'm feeling quite nice and mellow. And yes, I'm looking forward to the art exhibition, and church!

ps. you can get as much scheduled work as you want but I strongly advise against going for paid work - I am old and hung in there with the workforce for years and years and years, blaming myself for struggling to hold down jobs when, in fact, it was discrimination MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE that made participation in the paid workforce utterly untenable. The quality of my work was good and my attendance was fine. Don't let the paid workforce wreck your life. Discrimination against people with mental illnesses is still 'out-of-control' in the paid workforce as everywhere else. I won't go into the reasons that I shy away from workplaces completely at the moment (and just work from home) but you even get discrimination in the workplace as a volunteer, although it's easier to take, as volunteer workplaces HAVE to at least TRY to accommodate one, and you can quit if they're too nasty.

Sorry if i sound a bit 'depressing'. The good news is that the pension is VERY generous in Australia (in my opinion, although I know some people who have very high medication and other bills who struggle on it) and you can do as much work as you like as a volunteer AND have enough money for a modest social life (ditto re pension expenses). The situation is 'ideal' once you have learned how to actually get help, and you're going to need god for that, as a starting point. Beyond one's faith, learning to NOT self-stigmatise, learning how to get the best out of Lifeline (don't self-stigmatise whilst talking to them and DO talk out any frustrations you have with healthcare you have received), learning the get the best out of support workers (only see them when you want to: don't 'let' them talk down to you if at all possible), and connecting with a local mental health drop-in centre (rich sources of support and socialising). At this point in history stigma and discrimination are utterly out-of-control - this is NOT your fault so adjust your life accordingly is my advice, as the 'buggas' are NOT going to give us an even break yet. I hope this advice helps someone.