Explanation for behaviour...??

I understand @Neelix

I have chronic pain syndrome and have the same thing happening at times

Sound distorts into noise - I can freeze - sometimes I can't talk and at just time I find people can get in my face wanting information - and I don't have time between their questions to answer any of them -

I suppose people might need an explanation but right in the middle of chaos who can get their mind in the right place? Not me anyway

But it sounds as if the cause can be different but the results very similar

I had some trouble with my daughter - a few years back she told me she thought I didn't like people because I will frown a lot - so glad she brought this up - I told her "No - I find people overwhelming when my back pain is severe - and I am not frowning - more likely I am busy grinding my teeth into splinters"

Some time has passed since that day and she has been more considerate -

For your own sake the people in your life need to know what happens that makes you freeze and then can't explain - I tell the people who take me shopping each week that I find crowds really hard and my hearing is acute so people using the loud speakers there - I don't understand a word they say and my ears hurt really

So - I guess you can tell your family, friends and work-mates as much as you like to about your MI - not having MI myself I suppose people might relate chronic pain more easily - physical issues are easier to understand after all - we all know that and from experience of both I know that

But if they will listen when you are okay then that will help surely - you need respect - we all deserve respect - and so many people just don't understand that

But it is easier to explain when we are feeling okay than in the middle of a major freeze and silent scream

I wish you the best Neelix

Dec

My doctor gave me an injection for the pain last night @Neelix so I do feel a lot better today - thank you

I have lost a lot of knee cartilege and I am walking bone on bone - and this has been making me feel really ill and taken my appetite - but I was able to prepare and eat something easy for dinner last night

Yes - your daughter is the person to start explaining to - and she does deserve the explanation - if she is a sensitive person then she may be able to help explain to other people

Yes - the silent scream - I think a lot of us here know that one

Dec

Hi @utopia

I am so glad to hear that things are better between you and your son - that must be such a relief

@Neelix

Chronic pain and fibromyalgia are different conditions - but both are painful

Fibro is an auto-immune issue I think - my grand-daughter has chronic fatigue syndrom - and my second cousin has fibro - and it's hard to tell the difference - but with chronic pain syndrome there are obvious physical issues that give us an easier time with the medical profession

My lumbar spine has Degenerative Disc Disease from L2/L3 to L5/SI - and Spinal Cord Canal Stenosis at L4/L5 and L5/S1 - that's the name of the discs in the lumbar spine - and this is painful on it's own but I am well-cared for and well-monitored - so that is all good

My doctor was concerned that I looked so ill last night but he supports me in not having surgery straight off - it's not really time yet so I am walking with crutches and my doctor wrote a referral to a physio-therapist for a brace so I can sort that our next week

I will get used to the crutches soon enough - I used to walk with them whenever I left the house but that time passed - that was for my back - now I am hoping to keep going for longer before I have to have an operation which I am sookie about

I am glad you shared your fears and feelings when you are having a pain-attack or other freezing-up problems in public - it can make the world a scary place when we find we can't explain things

I have actually thought of having a badge to explain myself when I am alone but mostly I have something with me when I am shopping

We need to look out for ourselves

Dec

Hi @Neelix

I am glad this is helping -

I don't mind talking about my chronic pain - and to me if chronic orthopaedic issues are my lot in life there are certainly things that are far worse

So my spine, my right knee and my left shoulder have all felt the brunt of the sporting excesses of my youth or the unfortunate affects of a car accident - and also I think that there are members of my family - including myself - carrying a gene from one of my grandmothers because there are at least 5 of us with chronic conditions and my dad told me his mother was always ill - but he was rather intollerant of this and I never discussed it with him

I have learned a lot about "voices" in the past years but I recall the first time I had a burn-out when my son's MI got the best of me for a while - and I saw a psychriatric nurse before I saw the psychiatrist and she asked me if I could hear voices - and I said - "Of course" - and she asked me what they were telling me and I had to tell her - in my ignorance - that there was nothing wrong with my hearing and I could hear her perfectly well

Oh yes - but hearing the voices that some people hear here - yes - you would have to tell them to wait in line if that's possible - probably not - I wonder if my son heard voices but I will never know

Yes - there are security people looking out for us all the time - I was asked if I was okay when I was flying home after leaving home that morning at 4.00am to go to a funeral and it lasted 3 hours - and I was flying home on the same day and I was hungry and exhausted and in pain - and it's good that people are watching out for us -

But sometimes it is really hard to explain as you have said

Dec

Hi @Neelix

There is nothing they can do for my spine - and yes - it is progressive but it's probably something that started much earlier in my life so it's not a rapidly degenerative condition.

I have had two operations on my left shoulder after it was badly damaged in a car accident and I have had two operations on my right knee - originally a sporting injury - stuff happens - I was into a lot of sport and the same mind is running the same body today as so many years ago - I have strong medication for the pain and over many years learned to manage and I have a Aged Care Package so there are people who come here and do some of my chores and assist me shopping but I cook for myself and do the washing except for my doona cover which is a Queen and one of them is wonderful but soooooooo big - no way could I manage that one

I am sorry about your mother - 33 is a very early age to die - she hardly had time to live and still it is not a subject that is discussed - and you are one of 9 - that is quite a family and such an unhappy thought that 3 of you have MI - I really think it would have been easier to have discussed this but my family of origin doesn't talk about things either - we were all tipped out into the world protected by nothing but our ignorance. I did an accounting diploma though and always got work as an accountant in a company somewhere - I have always known what to do with my money

Silence in a family is so corrosive - no one would talk about my son's MI - BDP - he died when he was 16 - his choice and I guess that's his choice - but horrifically sad - too young to go - like your mother

My mother always seemed ignorant to me and when my dad died she totally lost the plot and went on for 4 years with some kind of dementia - my family won't talk about it so I don't know - amazing how people want to keep it all quiet when I am sure we are all entitled to the info about all illness - MI included

I don't mind erratic - I think I tend to rattle on myself - I enjoy the writing and the reading -

All the best - this has been a great discussion

Dec