MaggieSenior Contributor
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Taking the plunge
10240 replies
In response to: Taking the plunge
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
When we're on that sort of adrenaline rush, it's kind of like auto pilot mode almost (it can be to me, not sure if it's like that for you too) @Maggie. It can be really hard to recognise it, and even if we can, it can be really hard to stop it or not roll with it.
I think crash and splat is tough enough. It doesn't us to feel worse for not being able to see it or stop it, though I understand it's scary and that it can be helpful to reflect on to work out what's going on. I'm still learning how to do that gently, without making myself feel worse in the process.
Did you see your counsellor while it was happening? Wondering if she might be able to help you identify it?
I think crash and splat is tough enough. It doesn't us to feel worse for not being able to see it or stop it, though I understand it's scary and that it can be helpful to reflect on to work out what's going on. I'm still learning how to do that gently, without making myself feel worse in the process.
Did you see your counsellor while it was happening? Wondering if she might be able to help you identify it?
In response to: Re: Taking the plunge
MaggieSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
@CheerBear I spoke to my counsellor on the phone, but not since the splat. I think a big part is the internal critic, voices from the past. It all mixes itself together when I feel vulnerable, then I become my worst critic.
Ive been thinking a lot about freedom. Personally, it's hard. I expected to move into it like a second skin. Instead it's tiny piece by piece, and it's scary. I had a little cockatiel a few years ago. I bought him with a large cage. Once home he ate and drank, the basics, but he was unhappy. Slowly I brought him out of the cage, 10 min, 20. His wings were clipped so he couldn't fly. Eventually he was out all the time and his wings grew and he slowly learned to fly. I got rid of the cage. Instead he had a play station and was covered at night. Often I woke with him on my pillow right beside my head asleep, safe, free. I guess I'm a lot like him. My wings are clipped. I think I'm saying this because my counsellor moves really slowly, gently, never critical. I learning from her.
In response to: Taking the plunge
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
Love that story of your cockatiel @Maggie. What a lovely, gentle way to think of it.
I think of freedom often and have ever since a worker said to me that once we moved out of refuge, "you'll have all the freedom you deserve". Hearing you say you expected to move into it like a second skin, made me wonder whether I set the expectation of it being an instant 'thing' that happened or that I felt. It hasn't worked like that, and I feel so angry at myself (and the whole world sometimes) because of it. Maybe it can take time and maybe freedom is something we do have to learn too, when it's not something we have been used to for whatever reason, just like your cockatiel. And like learning to trust also, just as your furbaby and my street cat have done. Food for thought, thank you.
So glad you have your counsellor. She sounds wonderful for you.
I'm going to start my day properly now some of mine will be stirring. It's been really nice to chat this morning.
❤ for you in your splat.
I think of freedom often and have ever since a worker said to me that once we moved out of refuge, "you'll have all the freedom you deserve". Hearing you say you expected to move into it like a second skin, made me wonder whether I set the expectation of it being an instant 'thing' that happened or that I felt. It hasn't worked like that, and I feel so angry at myself (and the whole world sometimes) because of it. Maybe it can take time and maybe freedom is something we do have to learn too, when it's not something we have been used to for whatever reason, just like your cockatiel. And like learning to trust also, just as your furbaby and my street cat have done. Food for thought, thank you.
So glad you have your counsellor. She sounds wonderful for you.
I'm going to start my day properly now some of mine will be stirring. It's been really nice to chat this morning.
❤ for you in your splat.
In response to: Taking the plunge
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
Hugs to both of you ........ ❣️
@Maggie @CheerBear
Hi to everyone else here ..... 👋💐💕
@Maggie @CheerBear
Hi to everyone else here ..... 👋💐💕
In response to: Re: Taking the plunge
SnowieSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
@Maggie@CheerBearthoughts with both of you 
In response to: Re: Taking the plunge
MaggieSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
Thoughts are with you too @Snowie. Thankyou.
In response to: Re: Taking the plunge
TeejSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
@Maggie I think your so good enough. I think you have so many qualities that are more than enough. I think you are kind and caring and smart and artistic and probably lots of other things I don’t know about you. If lots more people had more of your character the world would be a better place.
Go gently on you. You deserve much kindness. 💜🤗
In response to: Re: Taking the plunge
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
Couldn't agree more 💕❤
In response to: Re: Taking the plunge
MaggieSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
@Teej Ditto.
In response to: Re: Taking the plunge
MaggieSenior Contributor
Re: Taking the plunge
@Former-Member
