RE: Darkness surrounds me

@outlanderhun you are such a caring soul

I don't even know why I started stalking to the GP about that stuff, I never have in the past. She just set me off tonight and then one thing led to another.....

I worry about you too, all the time

Hun I am just afraid that if I start talking than those gates will open, everything will come rushing out and I won't be able to stop myself. That is really my real concern atm. I think they need to stay closed wih the padlock done up atm. Might have to hide the key!

@Former-Memberbecasue you needed to get it out to someone esp since your psychologist is away. someone offline and that is ok i just wish there was more compassion there.

well if you do want to talk, i am here and you can let it rush out faster than you can type if you need. i will be here to listen to you. but i get that too, sometimes its just to hard to talk, but whats it doing on the inside in the process

@Former-Member

@outlanderI let a tiny bit out yesterday on the HC and that is enough for now. I know what it is doing to me, I know from GN2 being out of control and struggling with GN1 atm.

I guess it is a learnt behaviour, or so my psych tells me. Hidden things from such a young age, why change now?

How are you feeling? This is not all about me either

well little bits at a time @Former-Member theres no pressure at all. i get the hiding things. its hard to change those habits learnt from a young age huh- kinda like a brick wall blocking what we want to say from coming out "thats quite enough no more"

i will help you get through tonight, i dont think much sleep will be coming and who better to spend it with

i think for now its best not to say what im feeling on here.

@outlandergorgeous pics btw.

Yea, baby steps for us both hun. Thank god except for a few ppl they don't know what GN2 means.

Big hugs hun for you too

@outlanderbaby steps it is.

Have you got any plans for tomorrow?

@outlanderwould be nice if you can have a rest day.

It is 42 here tomorrow so I think we will be spending the day inside in front of the aircon! Kids will probably put the sprinkler on and run under it, but I don't plan on moving from infront of the air con!!!