Meeting the needs of children when a parent suffers from mental illness

Sorry I cannot help. @Determined Thinking of you and your S2.

Off to meet the Principal for S2 this afternoon,

I am trying to plan in advance what I need/ want to say so it is objective and in everyone's best interest.

At the base of it all though if things don't change we will have to move schools 😞 despite it being a great school.

Well that was a waste of time.

He was 15 min late then it was a case of is all under control what else do you want to talk about. More than a little disappointed.

S2 doed seem to be more content though so just a case of wait and see I guess.

The more I think about my meeting the more feel like I was brushed away like an annoying fly. He had absolutely nothing to say when I said my son would rather die than go to school.

I should have been more direct in questioning about a formal process that should be being followed as a result of our complaint.

@Determined, it's possible the principal felt out of his depth and didn't know what to say.
I'd probably be asking whether you could get a mental health plan and access counselling for your son via the education department. We've just been filling out paperwork for exactly that for our daughter, but I don't know if the procedures are the same in Qld. as here.

All too familiar for us. I think mental health awareness in schools is better now than it was 10 or so years ago, but it's still not always easy getting help.

Well we now have a referral and mh plan for S2 to see a psychologist. Wait time will be about 5 weeks unfortunately but have to start somewhere.

After being disillusioned with my perception of the school principals respons post our meeting, after a discussion with S2s teacher at the end of last week I now know he has taken our concerns very seriously and has been working to ensure that necessary supports are in place.

Teacher has (who has just returned from sick leave) is also very much on the case and sensitive to S2s current emotional situation. I am most grateful for this.

GP was also fantastic for him this afternoon despite him not actively engaging in the discussion. I think he is a little embarrassed by it all.

@Determinedi believe my parents conceived me and raised me for their own benefits. And my life and their lives separated when I realised they wanted my life to be about them. And on the other hand... I wanted my life to be about me. Essentially they pulled support from me when they realised i was not turning into who or what they wanted. And once they realised i wasn't going to support their lives in the way they initially intended me to. It became a story of 'there is something wrong'

Sorry to hear that @eudemonism

My desire is that our boys never feel like that...

I want them to feel valued and loved no matter what. I am far from the world's greatest dad But my desire is for them to always feel safe and happy.

So tonight I was bluntly told that one of the children think I am picking on on them because I hate them.

While I need to maintain boundaries (hard when the mother wants to be a friend rather than a parent by my perception) I also need to respond with love and encouragement.

The emotionally challanged me at the moment wants to respond with 'fine you deal with them and all the crap I am dealing with'

It is a bit cutting when I have that put on me when it feels like I am jumping through burning hoops to keep everyone happy.

This evenings sook came after I said enough was enough when we were still messing around over an hour after bed time. Now tomorrow we will all wonder why everyone is so tired.

It makes it complicated when there is a history of mi.

The whole issue of percieved rejection and abandonment is the basis of darlings issues. children are already at increased risk so I need to tread carefully and with love... at the same time I have seen the hard way with darling how a lack of boundaries just creates a bigger monster (*as in the illness not the individual)