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utopiaSenior Contributor27 Aug 2017, 3:34 pm AEST

HOME

Well I'm finally home (again).
4 hospital stays in 91 days. Wow. No wonder it feels so strange to be in my own house again. Adjusting will take time. Cooking for myself will take time.
My house is in the same condition in which I left it. A pigsty. So no one room has warmth and charm to lift my mood. Will have to slowly start cleaning up - one room at a time.
I did go and watch my son play soccer in the finals. I'd been so sick this year - thst it was the first game I had been to all year. His team lost. But they play again next week. So still stand a chance of playing the grand final.
My son is still living with my mum. Has been since the end of April. Hopefully he will see how much I've improved on my new anti depressants and anti anxiety meds. Then he may choose to come home soon.
Was up and doing the washing early this morning. But now reading a book in bed.
Am very bored. But have AA Meeting tomorrow night.
And I have my WorkCover IME (independent Medical Examination) - psych interview with a tough psychiatric on the 30th of this month. Think it could be on Wednesday. And then I have my much waited for Psychologist appointment. Can't see him when I'm in hospital (too far away).
So that's it for now. A new thread for a new beginning.
@Zoe7 @soul @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Bast @oceangirl @outlander @Former-Member @Teej @BlueBay @Owlunar

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In response to: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 12:37 am AEST

Re: HOME

Feeling alone and loneliness seems to be a popular subject on the forums at the moment @Owlunar. Have discussed this with a few people tonight - hamsolo01 - teej - etc.

In response to: HOME

TABSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 1:41 am AEST

Re: HOME

Hi @utopia @Teej sorry for butting in. But it all sounds very familiar. Except I don’t really go out. Too busy trying to survive I guess. Yes it did occur to me today re ‘no mental/social stimulation ‘ I used to like going to supermarket just to get a smile and small talk from a familiar face. Doesn’t seem to work anymore. It’s all become functional

In response to: HOME

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 4:01 am AEST

Re: HOME

Hearing you all.

My hubby was working 100 hr weeks ..... my family were living hours away in the country ..... mil was toxic ..... was “on my own” with the kids .....

@utopia glad to hear you will try the book club. Keep trying new things. It’s generally a combination of small things that begins to make a difference.

❤️

In response to: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 10:19 am AEST

Re: HOME

@Owlunar - maybe we need to push ourselves to get out there and start a conversation with someone. At the supermarket or on the street. Sort of g'day. Love your dress. It's stunning. Or what a cute dog. What is his name.
Maybe we need to get out of our social isolation cocoon.
@Faith-and-Hope that would have been so hard raising all your kids pretty much on your own while your husband was working such long hours.

In response to: HOME

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 10:28 am AEST

Re: HOME

It was hard @utopia .... but any time I started feeling too sorry for myself, I came across people whose lives were just as hard or harder ..... and these forums are like that .....

We have a herd here ...... 🤗💕

In response to: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 10:33 am AEST

Re: HOME

I think you are one amazing tough woman @Faith-and-Hope. You have / are struggling like the rest of us. Yet you seem to be able to keep moving - keep going forward.
Not sure if this is due to your faith or to your wonderful mother and the things she taught you.

In response to: HOME

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 10:45 am AEST

Re: HOME

Maybe both @utopia ?

While we moved around a lot growing up, and both my siblings had disabilities, I also did not suffer any major childhood trauma as many here have. My Dad was considered a workaholic, but my hubby has left my Dad’s record completely in the dust, and then some ..... and it’s not like there were warning signs when I met him ......

Life can be so strange in what it turns up ..... feel like I inherited a lemon tree and lemonade stand sometimes ...... and are spending my life in this production ...... lol .....

In response to: Re: HOME

AppleblossomSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 3:50 pm AEST

Re: HOME

Hello @Owlunar @Faith-and-Hope @utopia

Yes parenting with all the practical aspects and the choices and values and guesses and gambles about what will be the best ... is a tuff gig. I remember the loneliness when I was married too F&H. I have been single about 16 years and it is easier as things

Just back from a lovely day at the zoo. For the last 2 days I had intense interactions with older foregn women.grandmas that were lovely and they were both really grateful. My role is visitor engagement and I am lucky I can be spontaneous with all ages, and getting more experience. You never know til you have a go.My first time out on the trails I was nervous, but the culture there is good. There is always someone smiling and saying hello as they get on to their specific job and the public is 99% in a good mood .. apart from the odd crying toddler. Some convos last 30 seconds about 7 mins. We had a PD talk about a Rhino sanctuary in Uganda that need readers and boots and water bottles.

There is a healing aspect for me as I reflect on the various family roles and typical scenarios that I had during my very distressed period.

Dont give up @utopia Your interests and values made a difference to me. I felt less alone knowing you were parent who actually cared enough to go off and your research. No one is perfect we muddle along. ... as @Owlunar says in that big puddle ...on mother earth.

In response to: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 7:39 pm AEST

Re: HOME

Wow @Appleblossom. Your work at the zoo sounds really rewarding. Do you work/volunteer one day a week or fortnightly?
Yes single parenting is hard. But when you said you were better off without your ex - I remembered back to when my ex husband was still with us & I hated it. Once I was single - I preferred it. I was then only responsible for one child - instead of two (when you include the ex). Lol.

In response to: Re: HOME

Shaz51Senior Contributor27 Apr 2018, 7:52 pm AEST

Re: HOME

@utopia, @Appleblossom, @Faith-and-Hope

as you know I did the opposite , single until i was 43 and married for a 11 years

sometimes I find it still hard from being single for soo long and being married now

don`t get me wrong I love my husband but I loved being single too

sometimes I feel guilty thinking that i loved being single but I am happy that i was single , but when I was single I did get lonely as I lost friends because they got married

but then I was soo involved in helping people and working looking after children and and lots of volunary jobs too and travelling

and now I am happy thn and now and what i have done but not with everything I have been through all my life

hope this makes sense , I think my thinking is running away so i am going to stop now xoxoxo

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