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@Faith-and-Hope @Zoe7

Just hibernating at home.

Still feel the same. Depression has lifted some. But negative thoughts keep trying to plague me. Suicidal thinking daily, but no desire or plan.

House a mess. No motivation for anything.

Patting Abbey and Dog more. Smiling more.

I'm just a jumble of contradictions.

Zoe - I hope Work is going well at the new school. Haven't caught up with any of your work stories.

F & H - hope things are going really well for you at art school and that you are exploring lots of different mediums.

❤

Yes and yes @utopia .....

Good to see you.

Glad there are more pats for the fur babies, and more smiles happening .... these are as important as everything else ..... ❣️

Keep yaking baby steps, and please keep posting to us whenever you feel up to it. A single baby step of housework a day is progression too, no matter how small a thing it is ..... small things can grow.

💜🌷

As @Faith-and-Hope has said @utopia just potter around with doing a little of the housework at a time - it will eventually get done without it being overewhelming.

Abby and Dog pats are good - they give us so much love and affection and that is a good thing.

Work is going well. I find it hard to get up and going in the morning though - the colder morning weather certainly isn't helping with that. I quickly get into work when I am there but also glad when the day is over. All the kids and staff have been lovely so that really helps.

Hi @utopia

I needed to take a little time out from the forum so I really don't know what has been happening for you but I see today that you are depressed and really having a rough time

I'm so glad you have your pets there - it makes a lot of difference to have someone to pat and cuddle and give you oxytocin at such a time -

But I am sorry to hear you think about suicide - it's positive you don't have desire or plans - I wish I could be more helpful

This must be disappointing for you when you had a good patch some time back - hopeful the depression had left you - I understand but also expected that it would return - what a pain - something you could do without

Thinking of you

Dec

Abbey and Dog pats are good @utopia , sending you hugs too my friend

Hi @utopia .... ❤️

I caught your post. I am here and listening,

I am thinking that feeling flat would be a pretty normal response to going that long without sleep, and it might be related to the meds withdrawal as well .....

Emotional overload can lead to flat feelings too, and if we are in emotional overload for a long time, flatness of feelings can become our norm a bit too.

Maybe pick one small task a day, and just tick the calendar when you’ve done it (or go on the Daily Goals thread maybe ?) It’s a simple method for taking baby steps forward, but it can be really effective too ..... you’re not doing it for you ..... you’re doing it to tick the calendar.

Answered you on Good Morning @TAB .... 👋

How are you doing this morning @utopia ? I am struggling to get up and going to class this morning, but I will get there ..... and will check in across the day looking for you .... 💜

Bloody deleted my post. I put weight in the post. So I have to delete that. But I can't copyy post. Bugger

@Faith-and-Hope . Got some sleep with the sleeping med. Still feel sleepy now. But staying awake as I have a doctors appointment this afternoon and don't want to sleep through it and miss it. Supposedly she is going to go through my blood test and explain it all in more detail.

So I'm tired today. Flat. Don't feel like doing anything. But I'll do some shopping after I see the gp. Dog ate through the dog food bag and ate it all. Yes she is a Labrador. A true guts.

Have tried to find psychologists in my town, but struggling to find someone who deals with depression and work issues. I might call the old clinic and ask them if they know someone who can help.

Hope school is good when you get there.