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utopiaSenior Contributor27 Aug 2017, 3:34 pm AEST

HOME

Well I'm finally home (again).
4 hospital stays in 91 days. Wow. No wonder it feels so strange to be in my own house again. Adjusting will take time. Cooking for myself will take time.
My house is in the same condition in which I left it. A pigsty. So no one room has warmth and charm to lift my mood. Will have to slowly start cleaning up - one room at a time.
I did go and watch my son play soccer in the finals. I'd been so sick this year - thst it was the first game I had been to all year. His team lost. But they play again next week. So still stand a chance of playing the grand final.
My son is still living with my mum. Has been since the end of April. Hopefully he will see how much I've improved on my new anti depressants and anti anxiety meds. Then he may choose to come home soon.
Was up and doing the washing early this morning. But now reading a book in bed.
Am very bored. But have AA Meeting tomorrow night.
And I have my WorkCover IME (independent Medical Examination) - psych interview with a tough psychiatric on the 30th of this month. Think it could be on Wednesday. And then I have my much waited for Psychologist appointment. Can't see him when I'm in hospital (too far away).
So that's it for now. A new thread for a new beginning.
@Zoe7 @soul @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Bast @oceangirl @outlander @Former-Member @Teej @BlueBay @Owlunar

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In response to: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor03 Feb 2019, 5:08 pm AEDT

Re: HOME

Same temperature as you @BlueBay But no cooling sea breeze

I'll call the company tomorrow. @Zoe7 Hopefully they can have a look at it tomorrow or Tuesday.

In response to: Re: HOME

Zoe7Senior Contributor03 Feb 2019, 6:12 pm AEDT

Re: HOME

It is hot where you are @utopia and I really hope they can come tomorrow or Tuesday to fix it. You must be sweltering with no cool air. I hope the temp decreases overnight for you

In response to: Re: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor03 Feb 2019, 9:25 pm AEDT

Re: HOME

Got to 39 today. Currently 31 degrees. Tomorrow and Tuesday only low 30's. @Zoe7

In response to: Re: HOME

Shaz51Senior Contributor08 Feb 2019, 4:18 am AEDT

Re: HOME

hello @utopia how are you today

it is 3am here so letting you know i am thinking of you xx

In response to: Re: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor08 Feb 2019, 8:24 am AEDT

Re: HOME

3am. @Shaz51 What were you doing up at 3am? Can't you sleep? Is anything wrong?

I'm doing ok.

In response to: Re: HOME

utopiaSenior Contributor13 Feb 2019, 1:58 pm AEDT

Re: HOME

So I've rung up AMD made an appointment with my old psychologist. I haven't seen him for 3 months. But I just don't feel right.

I can laugh or smile at things I'm watching or seeing. I can find happiness in those brief moments, but most of the time I'm just flat/dead inside.

I have zero motivation to do anything, even though my depression has left, I'm still not on top of household chores. Or gardening chores. I don't have the patience to read a book anymore. I'm just existing. But feel like I shouldn't whinge, because after all the Depression has left. Think I prefer bring depressed. At least I know what to expect. And not getting things done when you're depressed is understandable. Not doing stuff when not depressed just means I'm plain lazy.

In response to: Re: HOME

Zoe7Senior Contributor13 Feb 2019, 4:05 pm AEDT

Re: HOME

That place where you feel like you are just existing is not new to a lot of us @utopia It is difficult when you feel like the depression has lifted yet you have no emotions for anything in your life. Getting motivated or excited about anything seems impossible - as does doing the mundane things like housework or gardening. It is indeed a hard place to be both emotionally and physically - one feeds off the other and if we are unmotivated to get moving then it affects us mentally as well - but getting that motivation to move is so difficult. Often we get into that pattern and it is hard to get out of. I am pleased you have reached out for support from your old psychologist - that is actually doing something proactive to help yourself and that is the first step. Let us know how the appointment goes my beautiful cocky friend

In response to: Re: HOME

AppleblossomSenior Contributor13 Feb 2019, 4:28 pm AEDT