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psychiatrist appt - terrified

psychiatrist appt - terrified

I Have an appointment with my psychiatrist by telemed today. I'm feeling sick about it because i stopped taking one of my medications after court because of how they used it against me to make me sound like a deranged psychopathic liar. I take it to help me sleep but they kept repeating what the use of the tablet is usually prescribed for and now they're saying that if i'm taking that type of medication i can't be stable enough to be a parent. They also kept reading out the psychiatrists report from when i was first in hospital in January and making me say that i was severely mentally ill back then, and perhaps i could be now and either i was lying when i said i wasnt or i wasnt in a fit state to know if i was or not. I'm scared to say anything to the psychiatrist because anything he says or writes will be flipped and skewed by the lawyers for my ex in famlly court. Even if he writes i'm recovering well they'll just say that proves i was 'faking' it in january to put off court. It feels like no matter what i do say its going to be used against me and i just want it all to go away! I'm not doing so well, i know i'm not. But im so scared of telling anyone. our next court hearing is in a weeks time. I thought that a lot of this stuff, these games and stuff would be easier if i got a 'win' in court but its made no difference whatsoever because the 'best' thing for the children is seen as having their 'father' in their lives - until he hurts them. The police and psychologists have all said he will eventually but it doesnt matter to the courts.

Sorry, rant over, has anyone felt like they coudnt talk honestly with their mental health team/person/people?

LJ

108 replies

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In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

You are ever hopeful 😉 I just need to find my mojo, or some energy to fight a bit. Most of me just feels like it'd be easier to give up. My poor psychologist wrote that she feels like a broken record lol I have her on repeat with the same stuff ... it just doesn't seem to sink in properly to where all the crappy stuff in my life has given me the beliefs that are concreted in there!
Living on an oily rag is so hard I'm just always playing catch up and when crap happens like the last few weeks it gets to the oh my goodness do I have anything to get bread and milk left doh!

In response to: Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Dear @Former-Member

I am not always hopeful but more the soldiering on rain or shine type. I am just a few years down the track ... you mentioned seeing a financial counsellor ... its worth it to be a bit tight and teach kids financial realities rather than pretend there is a money tree...and get out of your depth ...or be scared or bullied into present giving competititions ...we all have different situations ... proper food is often more expensive than coke and chips ...for about 5 years ... I bought no-name brands in order to ensure there was petrol in car to get to access arrangements etc ... there is help here and there ... and just keep your eyes open and move forward steadily ... you left for a good reason ....dont doubt your capacity.

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Dear @Former-Member
I'm thinking about you. Darling soul.

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Thanks

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Oops hit post by accident

Thanks for your messages apple blossom it's been maybe a better day I've been able to breathe and have just tried to remember that I don't have to deal with anything today and we're safe.

Thanks Anne

Lj

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

That's exactly what I told my children and my youngest son was 3 years old ........

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

I'm struggling so much but had a visit from the support worker this afternoon which helped but I'm so scared of saying too much. I wrote a bit of a desperate email to the psychologist last night who wrote back this morning and I'm so grateful that she is so calm. But it's coming up to evening again and I'm starting to lose the bit of balance that I had today. My chest hurts and my throat feels swollen shut. Kids have to go to school and kinder tomorrow and I'm so glad but terrified to be without them as well, and I have to make decisions tomorrow. Things are getting so overwhelming and I'm trying to focus on what I need to in the present but I just find myself panicking over other things or stuck in a memory that feels so real and then losing myself and not work out who I am. I'm so scared. Mental health worker tried to get me into see gp but no appointments until next tues and she's seeing if the psychiatrist will see me before the next appointment at the end of the month but I think he'll want me in hospital but I don't have anyone who can have the children this time and if family court hear... I don't know how to get through it all

In response to: Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

What things are you afraid of saying? Maybe put them in SANE's worry room.

Why do you think GP will want you in hospital? To me it sounds you are having a normal reaction to extreme stress ... I still spend time in that state ... make only one decision if thats all you can do ... keep shopping and keep food in pantry so you can feed family on automatic ... its what many many parents go through ... single or together ... its just do that next day's duty ...

I believe that you can do it ... you have people who believe in you irl and here ...

Dear lj YOU CAN DO IT.

The children will be better at school and kinder. Do some of the practical stuff,(panicked if it happens) but keep breathing and then crash on the bed .. it will be better if you can manage without going to hospital ..but if you reeally have to ... I am sure the links will be made .. but the decisions will still be there for you when you get out ...

you will be able to face the upcoming court things better

Our society puts so much emphasis on doctor and medical expertise ... Dear lj we are thinking and praying and crossing fingers for you.

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Thank you @Appleblossom I'm so glad to have this place and you! It's the psychiatrist I'm most worried about sending me to hospital as he already mentioned it last time to change adjust meds more safely.
Lj

In response to: Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

How long have you known this psych ... and can he develop a decent rapport with you?

I reread your first post on thread ... and realise its more about the stuff he tells the family court ... does the psych understand how that negatively impacts his therapeutic rel with you?

Dont underestimate yourself ...

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