psychiatrist appt - terrified

Hi @Former-Member

It's heartbreaking reading what you're going through right now. I think anyone would be struggling with everything you have on your plate.

Please don't let your past prevent you from accepting help. It would be easier in the short term to not take a risk and not use those supports, but in the long term, I'm not sure it would be helpful.

I don't want to promise that these supports won't 'come at a cost' perhaps it would be worth ironing out your thoughts by doing a pros & cons list and looking at the worst that can happen taking up the support and the worst that could happen if you don't. Then on the flip side, what is the best that can happen if you take up the support and what is the worst. Maybe that will help clarify some things for you?

I really think you deserve the support. I think I mentioned you to earlier - independence isn't about doing things on your own, it's about taking the step to take care of yourself and your family.

On the topic of your housing - it seems like there are a lot of complexities to this decision. Do you have a gut feeling on any of them - whether it be a bad feeling or good feeling. I have noticed in the past you have good intuition - but I know when we are in the middle of things it can be hard to follow.

😞 I don't like hearing you down - You know we are here to listen.. so if you need to vent, ramble, get your thoughts out there, advice or a tap dance (I'm so bad that it makes people laugh 😉 ) we are here.

Thinking of you *hugs*

Dear @Former-Member

Nik has great ideas as usual.

I feel exhausted just thinking about moving house and I dont have little kids anymore.

You say you have organisations wanting to support you ... is it having too many strangers involved in your affairs .. most mothers dont feel comfortable about that .. it is a strain on maternal bonds

I dont know whether its any help but I wait til I get a clear idea in my mind ...do the pros and cons thing and then .... ACT ... home base is essential for you ... even if its a temporaary refuge ...

sending calm gentle touches on the shoulder and strokes on your head ... keep safe

Hi @Former-Member

I'm really sorry to hear what you're going through at the moment. I imagine that would have been so scary to experience that confusion about what was happening today. It sounds like you are feeling extremely overwhelmed right now, which is understandable, you have so much on your plate! And feeling tired and anxious all the time would really exacerbate things.

You mentioned in your previous post that you were trying to put everything off to get through to the weekend, did that help at all? Will you have any time to rest and look after yourself this weekend? Also, did seeing your psychologist the other day help at all?

Echoing what others have said, we are all here for you and care about you and your family a lot. Let us know what you need.

Take care,

Shimmer 🙂

P.S. While I was writing this post I noticed you respond to a new member, your support for others even during your most difficult times is inspiring.

Dear @Former-Member dont underestimate the stress of the breakup, the moves and being on call for the kids.

Around my worst period just before separation ... for about 6 years ... I would lose my car in the parking lot ... going to the supermarket ... I panicked about it a lot ... but just kept on going ...walking around vaguely til I'd find it ... I was so disconnected and jittery

I havent done that for about 8 years ... BELIEVE things will get better

You are a smart lady .... we can never calculate all the consequences of our decisions ... life is too complex for that .... it might take a while for the issues to run their course ,,,, but you can take charge by making solid choices about the little things we can control ...

yeah not letting the diet slip too far is good ... I graze on snow peas ... crunch celery carrots etc ... but never a food fanatic ... I gave into a custard pull-apart today ... maybe a weekly take out ... regulate it a little ... so kids dont get into bad habits....go gently ... it really is one day at a time ...

caring for others ... is important ..but we need to lay a foundation for our own bodily needs and children's needs ... for a home ... sorting through the finances ... etc ... sometimes .... I just weigh the odds for a while ... and then just make a decision .... what the hell and go with it ...

do the due diligence but dont get too fixated on consequences as we cant know the future ...

Heya @Former-Member

I've been through a similar experience. A few years ago when there was a lot of stuff going on in my life - my father passed away, a relationship ended, started university, and my cat died.

I think things can get to a point where there is so much that we are trying to carry and manage, where it starts to literature overwhelm your sense. As you mentioned in your post, 'Everything is just too much at the moment..' I think this is a pretty normal response to everything that is going on. I don't think you are going crazy, I honestly think you are respondning to a high level of stress as most people probably would.

@Former-Member you are a real trooper. You are soldiering on through so much, but even soldiers get tired, and need rest.

I know that you looking after you as best you can right now. I hope that you can find some space to get some more well deserved rest and solace. Can you give yourself even just 5 - 10 minutes dedicated to not thinking about worries and stress? Maybe check out the worry room? Or limit the amount of time you spend thinking about a particular issue before moving on?

Stay strong, my friend.

CB

Hi lj

Yes I get in a panic and forget where I am. I loose the car at the shops, or go to the shops and have no idea what I'm doing there. It's awful.

Please be kind to yourself you have so much going on and then add lack of sleep. It's only to be expected that your emotions would be all over the place.

I know my daughter's have night terrors, it's not uncommon for me to be up 15 times a night to settle them.

Lack of sleep plays havoc with my ability to cope.

Please take care

Karen