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Something’s not right

not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

18135 replies

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In response to: not coping

Sans911Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

Goodnight @Emelia8

Sadly, not without pain @Eve7. All my life I have wanted to be really good at something. And I've not been. Even my latest project is failing miserably (in my eyes anyway) and I'm utterly devastated. I feel mostly responsible for that. Because I was at a course all day today, I had to cancel my support worker. But he did ring me in my lunch break, and I got teary and upset.

Please don't tell me I'm good at anything, because I truly don't believe I am. I'm just average. And I've reached the fifth decade of my life being sub standard or average. I know that we all can't be good or great at everything. But I have never been good or great at any one particular thing. Not sports, not cooking or crafts or creativity. Most things I've done have failed or not lived up to expectations. And I just can't live like this.

In response to: Re: not coping

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

Oh @Sans911 I am so sad that you feel that way about yourself. I won’t tell you what you are good at even though I see many obvious talents.

I understand the pain of feeling like a failure because I struggle with that most days too which is why I’ve made attempts to end my life on several occasions.

I see how valued you are on these forums and I know that there would be people in your real life who value you. You are very important and life for many is richer with you being here.

Love

Eve7

💜💜💜

In response to: Re: not coping

Sans911Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

I'm sorry @Eve7 forgive me. I might have been a bit harsh with my words. My head is not in a good place at all.

I'm going to get out of here. Goodnight to you, @outlander and @Snowie 💕💕💕

In response to: Re: not coping

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

Please be kind to yourself @Sans911 Its better that you’re honest with what’s happening.

I need to sleep now as I have ECT in the morning...fun...not.

Love Eve7

@outlander @Emelia8 @Snowie

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

Sending love and hugs @Sans911
It might not seem like much but youve been an amazing sister to me. I feel very lucky to have you. It means alot to me 💜
Ill be around for a while of youd like to talk or just sit. Im ok with either

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

Goodnight @Eve7 i hope ect goes well. Hopefully it might be the last one if your coming home on monday 🌻

In response to: Re: not coping

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

Yes, last one @outlander and hopefully never again.

💙💜💙

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

I really hope so too @Eve7 💛💛

In response to: Re: not coping

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

Thanks @outlander I hope tomorrow is better for you.

💙💜💙

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

Thanks @Eve7 few things to do tomorrow to keep occupied. Just need to get through tonight first
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