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Something’s not right

not coping

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

18135 replies

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In response to: not coping

Re: not coping

10 days then sutures removed and then itll still need a few weeks to heal on the inside properly but i can be at work etc @Jynx

ive got someone to replace me tonight. i wouldve worked if it was somewhere else but the place i wouldve been is to risky for infection wise this early in the healing process so just taking a sick leave. if i also didnt have the complications as well it wouldve been quicker and not as painful post recovery.

im working from home today now and tomorrow but have a psychology appt. normally we do walk and talk but i explained the situation and shes happy to either find a wuiet place to sit and talk or do telehealth as i dont want to cancel.

apart from that just pain managing and watching the tv i guess, playing games on my phone. ill be working the floor on thursday-sunday though so using the 2 days rest for sure

In response to: not coping

Re: not coping

thanks @Snowie

whatve you been up to?

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

@outlander Glad your psych is so understanding! Telehealth becoming a thing since covid has definitely been a boon in my books. My psych lives over an hour away and some mornings I just can't find the energy to make the drive, so she i happy to do it over Zoom - so glad I have that option.

I hope that the floor shifts aren't too stressful on you! Take lots of breaks if you can.

I hope the recovery is swift for you hun, and not too painful 🤞💜

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

yes and i quite like this therapist as well @Jynx i find shes a good support for me.

no those shifts are fine thats why i agreed to still do them even with procedure.

im starting to get pretty sore so i think ill aim for early bed tonight as im rather uncomfrotable but talking here is a good distraction as im not tired

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

Ach, so good to find a good therapist match @outlander. Like if you had a not-good match it's like riding a bike in the wrong gear. Then you find the right one and click! Suddenly riding is smooth and breezy. Annnnd then you go uphill (doing the work) and it's difficult and tiring but you know you're in the right gear and will get there eventually. I think that metaphor got away from me a bit but I hope you get the idea lol.

Early bed is good! Your body will need extra rest. But glad you've also got some good chats and wonderful forums vibes to keep you going until bed time!

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

ive had 7 psychologists in the past so far @Jynx i think its time for a win with one of them!
its not easy but its finally good to have someone i can talk to abit more honestly and start working through some stuff


im to uncomfortable to sleep or move or sit so im just passing some time at the moment

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

@outlander wow seven! Yeah about time, so happy you've found a good match! I've just counted, I'm on my 7th too! However four of them were not good and I had three or fewer sessions with them, so I dunno if that counts still haha. Also one was a school counsellor so maybe we say six lol.

Aww hun, so rough. Got a fav tv show or something to occupy your mind atm?

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

I’ve been watching criminal minds on Disney at the moment @Jynx I’ve been going through Netflix stan and Disney for movies to watch while I’m getting the treatment as tv takes up most of the with nothing much else to do esp when side effects start. I’ve also been watching some of the original Disney movies like Cinderella and beauty and the best sleeping beauty Snow White, all those originals

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

Oh nice one @outlander - yeah tv can easily get very dull if it's something you're sorta, cornered into through circumstances. My new fav movie on Netflix is a kids movie called Nimona - highly recommend! Also recently rewatched The Good Place, it's such a good show - give it a whirl if you haven't seen it already! Also Netflix 😉

I must bid you goodnight hun! Hope you get off to sleep okay, chat again soon 💜

In response to: Re: not coping

Re: not coping

I’ll have to have a look @Jynx I’ll probably be floating around the next couple of days while I’m working from home but also preparing for heading away
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