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Recovery Club

Coming to terms with reality

Coming to terms with reality

Hi Readers, i am suffering from "mental health issues" and it is an ongoing, daily battle. I am pretty much constantly wrestling with the thoughts going on in my mind. And my psychical life seems too be suffering for it. (There is a huge difference between physical and mental ) something is definitely not right! So each day I'm waking up and going about my routine. And over the last few days, weeks and months. I have been noticing changes in my mentality toward myself, others and life. And some questions such as, what is my life about? And what should my objectives be? Have arisen... of course like we all are, I'm subject too making decisions... and there has been the same options in front of me time and time again for months on end. And it becomes rather draining and mundane. And i feel myself going around in circles like something simple just ain't connecting.

I enjoy writing, art, music. And peace of mind... walking, reading, meditation. Taking care of myself. Socialising. Etcetera. Getting ahead, getting in front. Planning, dreaming and so on. And do my best to look after myself. While accepting that it can only ever be so much.

But there just something not quite right. And I'm suffering for it on a daily basis. And I'm tired and fed up with going through the same stuff everyday. And in all honesty. Alot of my suffering comes from prospective and thought processes.

Does anyone wanna talk with me about some things that might help? In particular dealing with people no matter who they are. Can be very stressful and cause lots of procrastinating about pros and cons. In particularly people who i think about reaching out to for support. Because of dilemmas dramas and social dynamics. And picking up on things that "aint really happening" "gut feelings type of stuff " "intuition" that type of thing. And enjoying time with people is great! I just tend to be overly preoccupied with symptoms to be worried about socialising sometimes "Symptoms which involves others"

3494 replies

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In response to: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@eudemonism Hi Eude I am doing great today thanks 🙂 weather is so much cooler and apparently on Thursday we are getting a 16 degree day so that makes me a happy pea :D.

Eude says:

I've got pdoc appointment on Wednesday... so I'm unsure about what to expect... I'm part relieved and part wound up... I'm afraid nothing will get done and nothing will be changed... I'm unsure about how i should present myself and my case to him... + early next year I'll be going through counselling again... + have ndis support package underway... -i am really hoping for as much support as i can get... and to elevate my consistent and regular bouts of... stress, anxiety and depression...

Re: Pdoc I suppose it depends upon what you want from the pdoc consultation. Think good and hard on what your expectations are of him and write a list before you go into to see the pdoc so you dont forget anything. You are the client and he is providing a service to you but also he will be honest (hopefully) and tell you straight what he believes to be true (just like my pdoc said to me the other day when she said she wouldn't be able to look after me anymore if I messed with my meds).

It is good you are going in early next year for more consultations. Your health is of vital importance. I am so happy that you are applying for ndis package as well. You are really taking great steps in recovery Eude.

Write everything down before you go into appointments. That will help you remember questions to ask and also will be beneficial to look back on after seeing the pdoc etc.

Good on you Eude :). You should be very proud of yourself. You have come along way my friend. Love greenpea xxx

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Hi @Bunniekins I'm glad you're feeling well today. So far... I've written down a list of things i don't do... things i do do... things i repent and resent... and my goals... + I'm also going to... write a brief description of what life and my attitude is usually like... and what i would like my life and attitude to be like... I'm expecting his full support with what I'm needing help with, in a fashion that I'm happy with...

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@eudemonism That sounds all very positive Eude :). I do hope your pdoc session goes well for you. Do let us know what happens.xxx

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@eudemonism Re the animals thing. I have issues re feeling many pets get a better deal than I did. I was very damaged at the end of my marriage. It upset some doctors, but the damage was done, my family did not give a hoot, and the fixing was a very very slow process and never going to be complete, nor give me back my lost years. It is a recurring theme for me. Dont take all things I say personally. I have gotten a lot from working at the zoo and seeing and learning all about the different way animals live, not just the typical pets.

It is great you are going to get more support and counselling. You deserve it.

I hope your appointment goes well, but with my son, we have developed low expectations of his pdoc. He has to go, but is not getting a lot of value. So we do the due diligence but are seeking better elsewhere.

Your attitude to doing the work is great and I hope you get some good workers to walk with you (whatever level, peer Social workers, psych nurse whatever). Sometimes pdocs are locked into a narrow way of operating ( meds and ECT are the tools they know) and you cant get blood from a stone ... if you get what I mean ...

Good Luck with it tho ...

Now that the NDIS is touting the benefits of choice, I truly hope you get to experience those benefits.

Chat later.

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Thanks @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Yea who knows? @Appleblossom
I'm not sure what the outcome Will BE. -sometimes thinking about my whole situation with the system and professional's is very frustrating... why? Because sometimes i genuinely feel there's not a great lot they can do...

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Bunniekins@Appleblossom

@Faith-and-Hope@Zoe7

@Sophia1

How are you going this evening?

I hope all is well...

I'm just settling down for the evening... I've done very little all day... went for a drive with Misty just before, stopped in and grabbed a bag of chips for tea, now watching some tv... -it's started drizzling/raining just before...

Am feeling tense and restless...

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Sorry your feeling tense.

I am finally using the internet the way many use it and browsing music and film.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZQzW_QfPew

Not sure if you like Crystal SIlence.

Hopping out to give son a lift.

Food is all done here. Early. Maybe just have a few pieces of fruit if I feel hungry.

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

@Appleblossom@Bunniekins

@Faith-and-Hope@Zoe7

@Sophia1

I'm noticing akathisia is becoming a big problem. I'm only just realising I've been dealing with this terrible condition for a fair while now. It's horrendous really.

Awhile ago. The pdoc prescribed me anti depressants. I took one and it totally bombed me out. It totally ruined my sex drive. And it make me very sleepy and sedated. Plus around the 17-18 hour mark -after- taking the tablet, when i was withdrawing, when it was coming out of my system. The tardive dyskinesia kicked in. And omg! It felt like i was retarded. It felt like i was having a stroke. When i was going through a bout of tardive dyskinesia-it genuinely felt like my life wasn't worth living -this was the main reason i stopped taking my oral anti psychotic tablets before i smashed all my stuff up/relapsed. After this they put me on the depot. Now I'm dealing with akathisia + the weight gain, sexual problems, blank look on my face,

In response to: Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Re: Sharing the wisdom within

Not easy @eudemonism

it is why

i was one of the first to mention the issues around tardive dyskinesia on this forum. I did not like that meds were presented as a be all and end all ... without disclosing the side effects.

What did you think of the music?

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