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Something’s not right

-Enigma-

-Enigma-

I have given up now - no one can say it was not without a fight. But then no one on heaven and earth would give a damn anyway. I gave from the heart and it was a joy to help others. I felt such peace with that. I never did it for anything in return ever, I did it because I truly cared and felt so much genuine compassion towards others. I was promised dreams and peace would come true even though I never asked. It felt so good to know I made someone's lives a bit better.

Why is it that people like me are then faced with so much heartache, injustice, trauma and adversity that seeks to do everything in its power to destroy that good, to take the little good and peace I had, to utterly destroy me. Why?

I had always been there when possible others times of need - now that I truly need someone I have been all but abandoned by those I knew and those in the spirit. I realise now everything was a lie and feel utterless helpless and lost. I have lost everything and don't see the point in being here. I hope I don't wake up to another day of despair.

1732 replies

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Your most welcome @Former-Member i know your struggling quite abit yourself ao im glad those flowers made you smile even for a moment ❤

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Below are the beach/lake views around our new home site. Gives me comfort 💞

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Waiting on pics @Former-Member ....

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Still waiting....

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Those pesky triangles @outlander lol xx

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Yes @Former-Member hopefully it comes up soon! Am looking forward to seeing the scenery

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Hi @Former-Member

It has been a while since we have chatted but I do think of you everyday though. You are amazing and kind person- who deseves a peaceful and happy life. Let me know how your husband goes with his appointmet on the 2nd March and I will sending you both healthy vibes and positive outcome for him.

I am so glad to read your dream house is happening for you both, I hope the ocean brings you both peace of mind and enjoyment to your life. Its a great spot you have choosen.

Just remember you can only help as much as you can because you need time out for you too. You have such a kind and generous spirit, I wish more people where like you. Its good that recognise that you're tired and need to spend time with people that energize you and lift your spirits. I am glad you have good people in your life.

I can't believe we have not spoken much since my admission to hospital from last year, it did go well. I am making progress. I will be soon volunteering for the Commonwealth Games. I have a bit of a headache for the last few days and just trying to take it easy tonight. Tomorrow I will go for a massage because I don't want it to get worse.

Keep your chin up and do the things you enjoy. I think of you too. Best wishes always...

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Hi @oceangirl

It has been a long while since we chatted - it was so wonderful to read a post from you! And such a beautiful post that made my evening. Thank you for your kind words, support and friendship. You are a very loyal person and I hold such in high esteem.

Also wonderful how the hospital stay went well - and volunteering at the Olympic Games - how exciting! That will be a wonderful experience @oceangirl and you are just the lady to do a wonderful job. Can't wait to hear about all about it!!

Ironically I have also been suffering headaches the last couple of nights. The pain is starting from the back of my neck and spreading up towards my forehead. Makes it hard to concentrate. Not sure if I have done a neck injury (ironically again given my husband's neck pain), or it's tension. I have been under quite a lot lately. Our new house is starting to be built but there is further legal complications which is furthering my tension. Not sure what is going to happen - everything is surrounded by so much uncertainty so I just have to plod on and hope for the best. But yes, it gets very tiring. I have a need to sleep now for 9 hours every night. If this house falls through again I will pack up and leave the whole area behind. Not sure where I will end up.

Thanks again for your support - it is really appreciated right now. Enjoy the massage - sounds heavenly. Sending a warm thoughts and hugs your way 🤗💜

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Your new icon picture is beautiful @outlander - so serene.

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

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how exciting! That will be a wonderful experience @oceangirl , my sister and you are just the lady to do a wonderful job. -- I agree with @Former-Member

Hello @Former-Member, I have my fingers and toes crossed for you and your house

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