-Enigma-

I totally understand the fatigue part @Zoe7 - it's good that you are getting out of the house though, a good balance happening there making some connections. My outings are limited too at the moment, but I always feel a bit better for making the effort. Keep in touch - am here whenever you wish to talk about anything. Hugs ❤️🤗xx

Hi @Former-Member

I have a mattress I bought that last year, it is quite comfortable. I believe the mattress I bought was a sleepmaker (azure medium). They have relabeled the mattress from azure (sleepmaker) but its the same mattress. I am looking for new bedroom furniture.

I am glad you enjoyed a nice day today. It was nice here on the coast I think it got to 22 degrees. It was still warm in the sun for me. I am hoping to spend the day down at the beach.

Look after you and I hope your injuries mend for you soon. Talk to you soon...

I am only going out of the house through necessity @Former-Member - appointments and if I need to go to the chemist/shop. I really am not making any connections - apart from my GP, chemist and their staff I really don't talk to anyone else. Even when I pay for items at the shop I say very few words. I just do not want to talk at the moment - at all if possible - it is too hard.

Hi again my dear @Zoe7 - when depressed everything can seem like a mammoth task - a bit like walking uphill all the time , I understand. I went through a period when I had a breakdown where I could not leave the house at all (due to crazy anxiety), for a couple of years. I was so bad that many don't know how I came back from that.

A lot of factors came into the why of how I got that way. Grief a big part, ongoing stress and psychological trauma/abuse all played a huge part. But so did peri/menopause and a thyroid disorder I did not realise I had. Have you had these health checks? The fatigue they cause is gruelling. So does worry about the future - use to drain me. I know you did say you suffer physical illness as well which just compounds everything and can take time to adjust. Baby steps..

I will totally understand if it is too much at the moment to respond here, no pressure at all my dear friend. Please just know I am here to help you through this day or night if you need me. Sincerely. 💜🌹xxx

That's wonderful to read @Faith-and-Hope - your son being in good spirits and that you all had a good day. Nothing better for the mind and body than having a good laugh in my book 💜🌹xxx

Hi @Former-Member Getting ready for the heatpump to go in today!!!!!!

My husband couldn't have children, so for a while we fostered. Three little boys every weekend, then a twelve day old beautiful little girl. She had issues with drug withdrawal from her mother, so it was very difficult but so rewarding also. Unfortunately the department decided she needed 24/7 care which I was giving, but they put her in a home where there was changes in staff. I have her finger prints on my heart over thirty years later. I understand in a small way how hard it is to let go of your daughter, part of your heart gets torn apart and never mends.

I don't do art, though I would love to. The shaky machine is for exercise, sorry to write so confusing. It's a vibrodisc. I'm trying to get out and walk but not being very successful atm.

The music festival sounds lovely. Music is one of my lifelines, though in the darkest times nothing touches it's pain.

I do think of my garden when I'm down @Former-Member. I find comfort in the simplest of things, nature being the main backdrop. I saw a spider web the other day, the rain had left drops all over it. It was stunningly beautiful, simple yet intricate.

I hope your day goes as well as can be expected. Thinking of you and Thankyou.

Hi @Maggie

Hope all is going well with the heat pump installation and that it's nearly all over for you. Be wonderful once it is working. Just want to let you know that I am going up the road to see the doctor now but will reply in full on my return. Have a wonderful day my dear friend 💜🌹xxxx

hello @Former-Member @Maggie @Faith-and-Hope @Zoe7 @oceangirl

Just stopped by to see how you all are.

Lovely to see the nurturing for one another and bonds you have built. It comforts me that you have each other.

I wish you all the best and thank you for all of the kind words that you have each given me at some stage as support.

I am not leaving the forums, just spending less time on them hopefully. More a cutting back time scenario for the time being. Not spreading myself out, overstretching my compassion as much.

My trip overseas did wonders for my self esteem that was so desperately in need of self care.

You will still see me about the place and please say hello if you are up to it.

I am very mindful of not isolating myself as I had before.

I need to get out in the real world; my ageing mother needs me, my younger son, sister, even a couple of friends whom I have not been able to travel the distance to see or have the energy for them to visit me at home. Of course my husband needs to have me back as a person too.

For the first time in a long time, I am able to smile more naturally. I feel that I am more accepting of the emerging self than I have been in so long a time.

My older son is still with me in my heart of course and I will hear from him when he wants to get in touch.

Then I will deal with the challenges as they present themselves rather than cause anxiety trying to think about what might be over which I have no control.

I want to live my life, alongside of life challenges and this is my first step.

My first baby step.

not goodbye just not hello as often .... start of looking after me.

I want to get back into my walking and gardening. My reading I have never lost thank goodness.

So perhaps when you notice a specific flower, foliage not weeds though laugh, think of me

take care lovely people xxxxxx

Hi @Former-Member

I'll be thinking of you.

I am so happy for you and wish you all the best.

I take a lot of comfort from your post, so thank you.