-Enigma-

What a blow @Adge, sorry this is happening to you in your workplace!

Sending you calming thoughts XxX

That realy sucks @Adge. How are you holding up?

Oh @Adge - that is shocking. Something serious has gone down behind the scenes. Understandably your mind must be reeling. We are here if you need to talk and/or don't hestitate on contacting someone if you feel distressed. Hopefully you will find out more soon and achieve the best possible outcome. We are here for you

Hugs @Adge .... that sure sucks.

It's does make a lot of sense @Adge Thats all we can do really that's in our control - trying to cope with change and life events. I am hoping that in your case once you have had a chance to process things that it will be the case "of when one door closes another opens...". And something even better will come along. Doing your best for now is enough and we are here if you need to talk anytime. Let us know how it goes

Hello @Faith-and-Hope@Maggie@Zoe7@Adge@Former-Member and all.....

Wow what a stressful night I had. I think I aggravated my injuries as the pain is bad again - and the nightmare are turning violent (violence towards me). After the violence in the dreams I turn to others who reject saying "I stay away because you are always depressed". I woke up in a sweat. I think the nightmare saids it all really. No one understands and I get no support here in real life. And it's now taking its toll. I feel not right...quite depressed to the point of nearly distressed. I don't know where to go from here any more.

I don't feel valued or important to anyone. Typical depression?

Thank you @Faith-and-Hope for replying as I am and have been particularly bad this last couple of weeks and it is starting to concern me. I think made worse because my coping abilities of keeping busy have been taken because of my injuries (just found out I have bruised ribs and torn cartilage). Any time I try and do something physical agony takes hold again so I have to rest - and my mind thinks, and thinks my situation....

The words you wrote "even though my heart is feeling abandoned" jumped right out at me. That is exactly how I am feeling. I am glad you are seeing that is not the reality - but I can't entirely do that presently. So I am glad you are there. I had a panic attack (I am home alone) and have been crying. I quickly took control and manage to take my mind of it. It wasn't easy as I was starting to hyperventilate. Very frightening. I haven't been this bad for quite awhile.....I am sliding down again. I feel so alone @Faith-and-Hope

I have a close friend but she has just had surgery on her kidney cancer, so I can't turn to her. And I have no famiy apart from my husband. Who doesn't understand and to what I can see is not too concerned. Other thing take priority (not sure if that is faulty perception but sure seems to be the case). So yes, my heart and soul feels abandoned. And knowing me I wouldn't anyway - I don't want people to think I am having another mental episode. I wasn't treated real good 5 years ago when I did. The danger signs are there again. It's just so nice not to feel alone in it. I would call what I am going through presently major depression or a result of,psychological trauma. I may have to see someone but don't want to take anything again (side efforts are horrendous for me).

Yes, young children/adolescents will take out therepain on parents as they don't know how to deal adequately with stress/emotions properly yet. Still burns badly though I know. Even though I knkw my daughter loves me when is so self absorbed I can't get through - and she has no empathy. She is like a stranger - no warmth there. She has her own issues to sort out.

Sorry if I am rambling - I don't mean to be selfish. I am in a bit of distress at the moment. I knkw you have faith and I really need to hear that right now xxxxx

hello @Former-Member

depression is so relentless, ruthless and such a pain in the proverbial

having dreams as horrible as they are is a form of expression.....if you are not verbally expressing your emotions during the day.. they might be emerging in dream form..write them down if you feel that you can and discuss when you next see your psychologist or psychiatrist. As horrible as they are they are a great insight into where your mind is at.

one of the horrible side effects of depression is that we are so low that we turn everything against ourselves. feeling that noone cares, listens or understands is part of the dreaded condition.

you have gone through so much and pushed yourself forward so much to help others.

your body and mind are now telling you that you have to just think of yourself now and give yourself time.

understandable to me that you dont feel valued or important as again this is what depression does.

when you come out of the depression you will recognise this as you have in the past.

so just let the depression be...dont fight it...be kind to yourself though...dont listen to the negativity...just be

hope not too deep over the edge. I just know this blech only too well.

i am at the cross stage... come visit and release some of that when you are ready. xxxxxxx