FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Something’s not right

-Enigma-

-Enigma-

I have given up now - no one can say it was not without a fight. But then no one on heaven and earth would give a damn anyway. I gave from the heart and it was a joy to help others. I felt such peace with that. I never did it for anything in return ever, I did it because I truly cared and felt so much genuine compassion towards others. I was promised dreams and peace would come true even though I never asked. It felt so good to know I made someone's lives a bit better.

Why is it that people like me are then faced with so much heartache, injustice, trauma and adversity that seeks to do everything in its power to destroy that good, to take the little good and peace I had, to utterly destroy me. Why?

I had always been there when possible others times of need - now that I truly need someone I have been all but abandoned by those I knew and those in the spirit. I realise now everything was a lie and feel utterless helpless and lost. I have lost everything and don't see the point in being here. I hope I don't wake up to another day of despair.

1732 replies

1,351 - 1,360 of 1,732

In response to: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Hi @Appleblossom@Former-Member@Former-Member💙💚

Hi also @Shaz51@oceangirl@Bunniekins@Former-Member ❤❣

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Just did my last chauffeur trip for the day. I’m so over everything. Long story.

Just saying, hi. 👋

@Former-Member @Appleblossom @outlander

💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

and anyone else reading.

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Sounds like a big day for you @Former-Member can you rest now and maybe an early bed?

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Hey @@outlander

@Former-Member

The car was going to solve all our problems ... and then the computer ....

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Hi @Appleblossom

Now I can rest.

Had a nice hot shower and ready for bed.

Funny you should say that about cars and computers. 😮😩

I’m not keen on driving, especially in the busy chaotic traffic.

Daughter will be having lessons soon. Then I’ll worry about her being in the chaotic traffic, lol. I try not to complain about driving her everywhere, because I know I’m not keen on her driving. Just have to “let go”. Hard being a mum, isn’t it?

And computers are handy, but, oh my gosh! 😫:face_with_rolling_eyes:

Today involved trying to sort something at an organisation, involving a COMPUTER We have been in there probably more than 6 times to try and solve the problem. Being told it’s fixed each time. Today we find out, the whole thing has actually been cancelled. It’s the system, she said. Ok. Great. Anyway. We will see if it’s fixed this time. Anxiety was, extreme HIGH.

The whole day was 😫😮:face_with_rolling_eyes:😩🙃

One positive is, I forced myself to walk at the beach.

I am sorry to read about the extreme pain you live with. And that you’ve had struggles with your son.

Stress certainly can cause pain to feel worse. ❤️

Take care of you and be kind to yourself. 🌸🌺

Did you see your daughter today? @Former-Member I hope you’re ok. 💜🌷🌸

Not sure how long I’ll be awake. Might check in later.

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

I often mop floors at night or do other chores @Appleblossom 😂

Whenever I can talk myself into it.

I have a bit of OCD, which does not help when lacking in energy or suffering from depression. At least the OCD isn’t as bad as it used to be.

In response to: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Hi @Appleblossom - my distress has settled but to be honest my mood is very low. Someone else here who I have been helping hurt me badly - this on top of episode with daughter has adversely effected me. Doesn't it always happen that way - all the blows come at once?

I will need to adjust - in both instances my intentions were good and compassionate - just really feel I have been kicked in the teeth. It's made me feel less of a person. It will take me a few days to sort myself - cried off and on later today. Some people I must have to keep away from. And surround myself with those who value and need me.

So am feeling down but hopefully will pick up soon.

What type of big day are you catering for your son? @Appleblossom. I hope it really goes well for him.

Sounded like your day was very frustrating with the computer @Former-Member - hopefully it's all sorted now. I am glad you had a chance to unwind. Hopefully tomorrow is a better day for us both. I didn't see my daughter again today which to be honest I am grateful for. I need some peace for a bit to recover and for my mood to pick up. Hopefully the week coming will be a more positive one for us all. I have a lot more cleaning to do a show the agent is coming over on Friday. May try and find some time to go out and see a movie and have a fun day out as well so I can forget the upsets of late.

What plans for the upcoming week do you have @Appleblossom@Former-Member@outlander

In response to: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

The above post posted twice. So I deleted the second here. Sorry

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Hi my loveley friend @Former-Member

Just popping in to say Goodnight ❤

Will chat a little more tomorow.

Big hugs for those yukky low feelings 😴❤💛💜💚💙❣

In response to: Re: -Enigma-

Re: -Enigma-

Maybe there is something to SADS and we all have it now! @Former-Member Do what you have to do to get all the ducks flying in line ... its a big project to sell.

He has a court appointment and an audition. So he can have a big breakfast.

I took great delight in buying healthy green stuff: avocado, spinach, brussel sprouts and black olives, butter and greek yoghurt... all keto ... he can make up the balance of fat&protein. We will see how he goes with it.This diet has come on very suddenly. I have a lot of his potatoes and cereal to munch through ... sigh!

@Former-Member

I am not really OCD but I also find that I have not talked myself into said household chores until late in the day. Or I get a sudden rush of energy, the dirt bekons and I am off ... my son often comments about my housekeeping hours, but thats really calling the kettle black considering his topsy sleeping. lol

1,351 - 1,360 of 1,732