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Hey Life - give me a break.

Hey Life - give me a break.

@PeppiPatty - regarding my story - it probably warrants a thread of its own. Really needing my friends@Shaz51@Faith-and-Hope@Determined@Former-Member@Former-Member@Anony18@outlander@Former-Member @PhoenixRising @Former-Member

Sexually assaulted at age 13. Have never told my family.

Went to uni and moved away afterwards for work so fully independent then.

Came back to my home town after a couple of years.

Had a couple of serious relationships and ended up marrying a narcissist used car dealer (say no more) Basically raised my kids by myself. At 40, he had a fling with a married 19year old who already had a two year old child. He fathered a child with her and I found out some time later when I discovered he was paying child support payments. Stayed in this loveless marriage until the kids had finished school, then divorced which was nasty and I suffered financially big time. Had loaned his business money but didn't have anything legal drawn up. He also moved a lot of money around and had an overdraft on our home.

Got into a relationship with someone who was actually interested in me and shared common interests. It was the best and worst time of my life. He fits all the criteria of BPD. Moved interstate to be with him. The relationship became volatile and he physically assaulted me. This is when I became involved with this Forum. On one occasion, a neighbour called the police and he was arrested. They saw my injuries, he admitted guilt and he was imprisoned. I stood by him all during his incarceration, funding an appeal and he was released after eight months only to be deported as he wasn't an Australian citizen. I joined up with him overseas but the assaults continued. He got sporadic help for his MI but wasn't committed to getting better.

Eventually after yet another particularly bad assault and having the police involved, I returned to Australia and that was four and a half months ago. He appears to be serious about managing his condition now, taking medication, going to support and counselling sessions and hopes that I will return. However, all trust has been obliterated. We still have contact and that can get traumatic at times.

I started off on the Carers' side but find myself on the Lived Experience team as well. I have been having sessions with a psychologist.

Thrown into the mix is my own family. They don't know what I have been through. I used to care for my father and mother, used all my holiday and long service leave, taking time off work and eventually quitting so I could be there for them. Two of my siblings also live nearby but they were more concerned about building wealth than our parents' wellbeing so it was left to me. My father passed away and when I left to be with my partner, my mother's care was transferred to them. I feel they resented my decision but for the first time in my life I felt I was entitled to pursue happiness (not that it turned out that way) The sibs shut me out and when Mum passed away recently things went from bad to worse and as Executors of her will they scattered her ashes when and where they wanted without telling me and are responsible for distributing her estate however they see fit. There was no funeral or memorial service.

I live with my daughter and my son lives with his father. I love my kids with all my heart and live for them. I have a dog (actually my daughter's) who is my constant companion. I do a lot of walking and listening to music to escape the depressing thoughts I feel. I have no idea what to do with my life now and think it's all a cruel joke.

331 replies

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In response to: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Hiya @soul, @Former-Member, @Faith-and-Hope, @utopia, @enigma, @Former-Member,
Good to see you all. Lovely picture F&H, such sill peaceful waters 🌼

Soul, glad you had good 'family time' on the weekend. 🎉

Thanks for the update. I really have enjoyed watching you grow with yoga, meditation workshops, building healthy routines and walking...

Really like what you said - that "meditation wasn’t about clearing your mind but acknowledging your thoughts and allowing those ones that are negative to pass by" And "Self Tending - - feeling good through our senses - drawing on them when needed" and resulting self confidence & calm. WTG!!!

A 4wk trip to Thailand for a month sounds amazing, wow! Big step. Of cause you'll have a 'minimalist' trip, knowing you, carryon... it is amazing what we can do without. Make sure your travel insurance is all up to date.

I love the sound of all those wonderful activities - "nature, exploring, massages, hiking, cycling, good simple food, interesting people..." Wow! Is it all a pree organised tour / trip or will you be 'winging' it day to day? So wish I could stoaway in your suitcase lol ☺

Its nice to "feel that the time is right" - that everyone you care about is doing OK. And I'm sure the pets will be fine and be all over you when ya back.

Excited with you 🎉🐦💜🐦
.

In response to: Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Just found this pic when googled Nth Thailand - it looks just beautiful there. You're gonna have a best time. Please dp share your trip so we can enjoy with you. Love&BestWishes 💜🌼

In response to: Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Thanks to you all for your kind messages. I have been to Thailand before for a shorter trip so it won’t be totally unfamiliar. I am making it up as I go but did book into a couple of nights accommodation (a comfortable place with my own bathroom for $23 a night) so I have somewhere to lay my hat when I get there.

Following that, I shall make it up as I go and want to venture around checking out some places I haven’t been to. It’s a really cheap place to live and yes, I will get travel insurance just in case @Former-Member. I’m looking forward to getting hour long foot massages for $6 as my splurge @Faith-and-HopeTraditional Thai massages are a bit energetic in a contortionist kind of way but after having done yoga, I think I can handle them. Refreshing fresh fruit smoothies for 60 cents, a simple stir fry meal for just a little more.

The Thai people are so welcoming and friendly. They live simple lives and this part of the country is indeed beautiful. Being at one with nature. The weather will be warm but cooler than it has been - much the same as here at the moment so that is okay.

You can all come along in my virtual suitcase as long as you don’t take up too much room. Just taking the bare minimum. I should be connnected by Internet most of the time so I will post my adventure.

Last night I started thinking about some things I needed to do before I left but then thought - nah, they can wait until I get back. I want to be totally relaxed and really immerse myself in this trip.

In response to: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Looking forward to hearing bout your adventures @soul maybe some pics too?

In response to: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

@soul your yoga and meditation journey sounds wonderful! I'm inspired to do more myself. All the best for your Thailand journey too. Go well.

In response to: Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Hi @soul ..... 🤗💕

I hope you have the best time .... and that it is peaceful and restorative.

The Far and Away thread is available for your travel log if you wish .....

Bon Voyage 🎉

In response to: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

@soul. Yes please. Take me in your virtual suitcase. You can open a new thread and we can all enjoy your trip, with you.

In response to: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

So happy for you @soul and trust the trip goes well for you. Will be thinking of you as you travel.

In response to: Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Exciting countdown. Only a couple days to go now @soul. Are the bags packed? 💼 Looks like life is finally giving you that break!! 😃✈️

In response to: Hey Life - give me a break.

Re: Hey Life - give me a break.

Bon voyage @soul
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