NOT COPING AT MOMENT

Hi @SCORPION, I'm so sorry to hear that you witnessed the accident today. It's a very distressing experience. I've been in the same situation and also been disappointed at how I handled it. Other members may have as well. When our 'fight or flight' response kicks in we don't always act in accordance with our values. We're just trying to get to safety.

Please try not to blame yourself for this. We're programmed to be this way. It's how we've survived so far.

I hope you received our email offering further support. It's probably a good idea to talk this through. Just getting the images and thoughts out of your head by sharing them is important. Talking is the way we properly process events like this and stop them from continuing to distress us.

Doing something physical too, even a brisk walk, will start to normalise things as well. Your system is still pumping from the shock. You'll feel better mentally and emotionally if you move in someway. That's how 'fight or flight' works - you need to run or hit something to signal your system that the threat is over. Since our threats tend not to be physical, we need to find a way to move anyway in order to calm down.

Please look after yourself Scorpion. The accident will have been dealt with no matter what your actions and the necessary things will have happened. It didn't have to be you who did those things.

Hi yes got the emai

Thanks for suport couldn't cope at work so left tried to ring my phych but not there so have had some meds and sleeping pills and just want to rest doesn't help that I am in quite some pain as well today just seems each time I feel a bit better life finds more ways to throw me back down .

Feeling that I am just a waste now I couldn't help I wanted to but couldn't feel like a nothing just really numd now will rest now thanks again.

Scorpion

Hello @SCORPION,

Sorry to hear you are in such distress, i just want you to know i have the same problem, whenever i come across any accident or other unexpected scene i do the same thing and freeze, my whole body feels like a ton of bricks, i can't speak, can't move, nothing. i feel for you as i know the dread of the Anxiety and the fear of doing nothing is like.

I hope you are able to calm down and get some rest, i know it is hard and i know you will dwell on it for a while, but i hope things get back to normal soon.

Wish you all the best

Jacques

Hi thanks for your kind words.

Its 3am and my nightmare has come back reliving the accident that started this all. Got up hada walk around the unit got a cool drink had a smoke and went back to bed .just to have a new nightmare this timei come across the accident I saw Friday morning but when I stop and look its me in the car and I still cant get out tohelp. I feel so lost and lonely right now just want this merry go round of a life to stop .

When ever I feel that I am getting on top of things life just gets a kick out of thowing me back to square one. I am getting pretty tired of all this people keep telling me to remember life wasn't meant to be easy but for f__k I sure I wasn't meant to be this hard.

I feel so angry at everything now.

Scorpion

Hi @SCORPION

oh i am so sorry to hear you had a bad night, when events like this happens i know it takes me a few days to move onto another thing to panic about, have you thought of speaking to a psycologist about it?

I know what it is like to be on the merry-go-round, i am their at the moment and have lived the past 14 years like it, i cannot give you much advice because i do the same thing, all i can say is if you need to talk i am always here to listen.

yes people can say some stupid things, you have to remember that it is not their fault, they can not come close to knowing what it is like to live like this.

i know you are angry maybe this morning when you get up make a coffee, sit near a window or out side, have a cigarrett and just look at the wildlife, try to focus on the moment, if you find yourself thinking about the incident try to find something to focus on, mindfullness may help.

Good Luck and take care

Jacques

Its cold and dark its 5 am very little sleep.

I've layed in bed all night to cold to get up and do things to keep the mind occupied elsewhere.

So I stayed in bed and argue with myself every part of my life and lost

I am not a good person the bad part is more active than the good and so my night descended

Into questions I didn't like the answers

I drifted of a few times to nightmares to counter point the argument that I have been a burden on the world.

If life is a game I've lost I just wish some had told me that the rules are ever changing and for othes to win

I must loose .

I tried to make right choices but they seem to always go wrong

I made only one good choice her name I Karen why she has stayed by my side I don't know

I seem only to bring pain and disappointment

Its now to cold to stay up so I have to return to the warmth of the bed but as always if fear the darkness as there lying in wait is the truth.

Scorpion

Hi Scorpion,

Sounds like a really tough night. I am glad that you got up to share what was going on for you on the forum and hope that you were able to get some sleep once you returned to bed. Sleep is so important so if you continue to have dificulties make sure you talk to your doctor of health professional to get some help.

Take care,

Durango.