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Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

This discussion is a follow on from my previous thread Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family, a thread I started when my wife was admitted to hospital for the third time in 6 months and when everything around me seemed to be falling apart. It was a space where I could vent and express my emotions and helped me to process a particularly difficult time not only in my own life but for our family and helped me to hold myself together in order to support my family. For that I am most grateful.

Those of you who were following our journey will know that on my darlings return home I have been encouraged by my councillor to implement some loving boundaries, (lovingly implemented guidelines, not as rules to be enforced), and some self-care for myself.

Now that my darling is home the purpose of this new thread is to document our journey of healing and implementing new boundaries and commitment to self-care, not only so that I can have a visual plan for myself (a bit of self-accountability to follow through with plans in place) but in the hope that it may help others processing similar trials. It will also be an opportunity to track our progress over time.

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In response to: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

No real plans for the weekend @soul<br>Have some uni work to catch up on and have promised my darling wr would clean out the pantry together.<br>Are workimg on a plan to go through the entire house as the clutter is gettimg her down but in little bites no more than an hour a week so it is not too overwhelming

In response to: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

My darling finds it overwhelming because it is a big job and ut is difficult for me as I have issues with letting go of things.
Particually if it was gifted to us but even somthing as silly as packaging that might look nice. Have mobile phone boxes under the bed from 10 years or more ago. If we do it cupboard and draw at a time it will be much easier for both of us is the plan.


In response to: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Have a 6 month plan to get the house in order. Hurta my head to even contemplate the shed.

My darling is so far happy with the suggestion so I just need to follow through and quietly deal with my issues around letting go of useless stuff that dosent matter.

In response to: Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

There's something liberating about decluttering. You'd be surprised with how much stuff you never use or need or look at. Through divorce where I lost just about everything and then moving a few times, I have very few possessions.

Maybe it will be a bonding experience for you working on a common goal and not a source of anxiety. How are the boys coping @Determined?

In response to: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

S1 is in his own little magical wonder land as usual @soul.
S2 I am concerned about. He has another councilling appointment next week.
Bub is doing great. His personality is really coming out at the moment.
All.3 boys are suvh a blessing and we couldnt be without them.

We are in limbo with S1 regarding high school next year.
Have put in an application this morning for special school but wont know for a month or 2. Time frame and not knowing is causing stress and anxiety for my darling and S1 . I am putting my head in the sand and trying not to think about it.

If the special school application is un successful Im not sure what we will do.
At least his current school is going in to bat for him and stressing that it is in his best interests.

In response to: Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Is there a high school with a special needs program that he could access @Determined?

In response to: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Morning @soul
Trust you are good this morning. I drifred off last night but then spent most of the night up with bub who had a bellyache. (Sister cooked dinner and obviously loaded it with onion again. Even my tummy was not happy)

Re the schooling options We also have an application in with the Christian school.S2 is attending and where S1 started. They have a high school program for apecial.needs. and were our first choice. Now the second choice and will be closest in structure to his current program.

There are 2 state high schools with special needs programs but the head of seu at his current school has concerns how he would cope there.

In response to: Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Hi @Determined - does S2 been through a verification process and does he have an education adjustment program? Providing funding for kids with special needs is all about going through the proper channels. It can be a tedious journey but hopefully at the end of it, his educational needs will be properly identified and met.

There are some really good options these days that can lead to fulfilling roles post school if students aren't fitting the norm.

In response to: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

S1 has been through the verification process and verified as II or ID or whatever they call it now. Under existing rules he meets the criteria for special school but under new rules effecitve start of next term he is borderline.

In response to: Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

Re: Caring for a wife with Borderline Personality Disorder- Sequel to Diary of wife’s hospital stay - holding it together for our family.

I reckon the Christian school would be the better option in terms of pastoral care should there be any ongoing issues concerning your Darling's mentalhealth and its effects @Determined

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