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Flower back & starting over

Flower back & starting over

Good morning everyone and to my dear friends,

@Former-Member@Appleblossom @Kurra @BlueBay @Determined @utopia @Zoe7 @Queenie @Sahara @Shaz51 @Former-Member

I hope you are okay.

EVERY DAY IS A NEW BEGINNING, TAKE A DEEP BREATH, SMILE, AND START AGAIN.

The past 12 month have definitely been a game changer for me. Although it's been over two years of starting to discover - step by step - my mental health issues and coming to terms with the effect my childhood and other trauma had on my mental health, the past 12 months changed my life. I was in hospital three times, learnt more than I ever thought I would (want to) learn about mental health and strategies, adjusted my life and in the end finished the career I have always worked for so hard and wanted more than anything else in my life. I've ended relationships and created boundaries. I've started slowly to accept my inner child and that I actually have mental health issues.

And now I start with a clean canvas. A canvas that I will paint on and over for the rest of my life. Layers and layers of acrylic colours. Space for mindmaps to figure out what's really important for me, space for happy memories and for sad ones, but mainly space for the here and now.

I know my post sounds encouraging and hopeful. I am hopeful that my current deep depression will lift and that I will find enthusiasm to start work on that canvas. At the moment I allow myself to rest. Rest from the struggles of the past 12 months. And at times when the fog lifts, I am encouraged to look at the world with different eyes and explore different opportunities.

You have all made a positive impact on my journey and I am sure there are new friends to be made, so I am back and hoepfully this time, here to stay.

Have a great day everyone x

117 replies

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In response to: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

@Zoe7

How are you my friend?

I'm heading out for a long long walk to clear the fog in my head... perhaps the cold wind will blow away a few cobwebs.

In response to: Re: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

@Former-Member Hi buddy I hope your walk was just what you needed to 'blow away some of those cobwebs'. I'm not doing too bad today. I even did some painting this morning Iam looking forward to Oceangirl's party tonight - hope you can join in

In response to: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

Hi @Zoe7

Yes it was. I'm still freezing and sweaty and content I got rid of some of that angry energy that I built up.

Where's oceangirls party?

In response to: Re: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

@Former-Member So pleased you got rid of some of that 'angry' energy. It is cold here as well. Not quite as cold as yesterday but not far off.

Oceangirl's party starts at 7pm - Oceangirl's Party Thread

In response to: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

Hello @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Sahara @BlueBay @outlander @Zoe7 @Shaz51 @eth @Former-Member

How are you all?

I have finally stopped beating myself up - at least for now. Living in limbo has always been problematic for me, but I've made some life changing decisions now, so fingers crossed, I have made the right decision and the right changes. Time will tell. At the moment I feel content and even a little excited 😊

Hope you're all well & big hugs x

In response to: Re: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

Tha pt is the best news @Former-Member ..... ❣️

In response to: Re: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

Hi @Former-Member I'm happy for you 🙂

In response to: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

Good morning ❤️

I'm haunted by my dreams last night. The kind where you wake up and remembered things that were better left forgotten.

In response to: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

Hi @Former-Member ..... 🤗💕

I'm sorry to hear it. Hopefully the dreams will fade from your thoughts across the day.

In response to: Flower back & starting over

Re: Flower back & starting over

Hi @Faith-and-Hope

How are you?

I think I am starting to put into practice step 2. I'm really good at distracting myself, but I sat down after I was completely distracted and recalled the dream and thought about what feelings came up for me. I had a cry and self soothed. Now I'm distracting again, I can feel the pain, but I don't want it to overwhelm me like it used to. I've gone out, made compromises and look a little bit like an oddball as I didn't really have time to think about my appearance, especially colour coordination, but I'm keeping my appointments and don't give in to the pull to numb my feeling with meds and hide in bed. I did a bit of comfort eating. And it's ok.
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