when is it time for hospital

I believe you have the right to make that decision @outlander, but is that you want to tell her? If you do and your aware of the trouble it will stir, make all of that a part of your decision. I'm sorry you have to go through this. Perhaps it might be better to think about it for a bit longer - I don't think anything has to be said right now.

Lots of love and support to you

I have to go break some branches now, and get ready for another cool evening. I'll be back on later.

More love, hugs and understanding for you Claire

@Former-Member shes not going to believe me anyway:(

it took a mental breakdown and 4 days in hospital to realise im not well.

neither her or her bf have changed since being out of hospital. it was a cover up, a lie, to get me out of there.

all they do is try to control me now and still the same as before. they dont beleive me.

it doesnt matter what i say anymore. they dont beleive me anyway.

its been proved over and over again.

i dont know whats worse- not telling them and they end up finding out and im in trouble

or i tell them now and they make me out to be the biggest liar yet again.

i already dont want to be at home and am here for as little as possible.

im afraid if i tell her ill end up in the state i was in before or worse!

Hello Claire

You can only think real hard and take your time, to decide what you want to do. If the outcome is going to be the same either way - then I think you should allow yourself that choice. I have an inkling you want to tell them, and if that's the case, just do it and then it's done. My advice is barely worth hearing, but how about next time you go to Delicious, once you've finished, give yourself some time to just sit in the paddock, your space, your time, and think about it

@outlander

alright Niqua

ill think on it. probably not with D, not really in the mood to be there lately

@Former-Member

alright for the past half an hour ive been talking to a friend- i dont know if im over reacting to this can i put it to some of you and see what you think?

@Former-Member@Former-Member@eth@Owlunar@Queenie@Shaz51

ok @outlander

so for the past half an hour i was talking to a friend about the horses and my new horse and how she was going

she asked what i was doing tomorrow and i said i might have aride tomorrow morning on my mums horse- the one ive been working on for months- but i might have to ride my sisters horse as well.

she said oh why

so i proceeded to tell her that her horse needs a little bit more school and as my sister isnt advanced enough shes having abit of trouble with the canter. she keeps going way to fast and i dont want my sister to get intimidated on soemthing that i can help fix.

my sisters even said can i please help so i said yes and ill ride her horse to get her under control and stop her from being feral.

i know how to fix this horse, its not an over night job but its a long term training process and as my sister gets a bit more confident she will be able to do it herself.

friend: oh thats nice of you, is there a reason shes doing this though

me: theres nothing physical ive already had her checked its jsut becasue she use to to endurance so it was either go slow or go fast. ive jsut got to teach her that she doesnt have to go flat out all the time with us and thats not what we want.

friend: a friend of mine was having trouble with the same thing- you should talk to them

me: thanks im pretty sure i know what to do, ive had the problem with another horse and had her fixed up after a matter of time.

friend: yeah but shes (her friend) more older so probably has more experience than you do

me: ok if i have any troubles ill ask her but ill try it my way first.

friend- you should have to keep getting on that horse anyway

me: we knew her faults when we brought her and we got her as i was aware that she would need a more confident rider to keep her in check if she started get a bit of cheek or picking up bad habits.

friend: you shouldnt have to do it though

me: patience starting to wear abit thin- i like her horse and offered to help so thats what im doing

friend: weird faced like shes always right- you need to focus on your new horse and noth on your sisters.

me: its not taking any thng out of my time, we both usually ride at the same time or im there soing nothing anyway so its not doing me any harm but rather helping and also keeping my middle sister safe but keeping the horse uptuned so she remains safe.

freind: i still think you should ask my friend

me: i will if i ahve troubles

friend: why dont u jsut do it now then at least you can be on the right path

i had to wrap up the convo and say ok i will and said i had to go.

she always undermines my experience or methods jsut becasue they arent her own. she has had a horse for over 2 years now and is still trying to work with it now and still haveing troubles.

ive been undermined to the point before where i jsut packed up my horse and said ill call it quits for today and walked away.

she has watched me fix another friend of mines horse- took me only half an hour and also taught my friend- she now rides well and also hasnt got the problem now at all.

everytime i meantion i have a problem none of my methods are good enough

im really frustrated and abit upset that she always does that- am i over reacting

Hi @outlander

I have no idea about your friend puzzle, understanding friendship is not one of my strengths - hence why I am now a recluse.

I just read your post regarding telling your mum about the diagnosis. As others have said, there is no reason why you have to tell her if you don't want to. You are a grown woman, free to share as much or as little about your health issues with whoever you want to. You know your family dynamic much better than me or anyone else here in Forum Land does so really it is up to you to decide.

Whenever I'm unsure about whether I want to tell someone something, I always hold off telling. You can choose to tell whenever you want to, but you can never "untell" something that is told.

im starting to think its better not having friends atm @Phoenix_Rising

your right- i cant untell someone so illl wait until i say anything until im sure.

i can already see how telling them is going to go anyway and im not ready to deal with all of it so ill wait