when is it time for hospital

Just try and breathe outlander,have another warm shower/bath if you have to or count back from 10 or 100 and think by the end of the count,you will stop.Be glad when you get to the doctor.💕

Just try and breathe outlander,have another warm shower/bath if you have to or count back from 10 or 100 and think by the end of the count,you will stop.Be glad when you get to the doctor.💕 Thinking of you.

Hi @outlander

Your mother isn't reasonable so you have an uphill road to reason with her - I had a lot of the same double-message stuff with my mother - it took me a long time to figure it out but I started to live my life regardless of her carping

I guess I am here to say - live your life regardless of her carping -

One thing I have learned through years of therapy and then learning from that therapy is that people do not want you to change - they want you to go back to what you were before all of this. You are changing and your mother wants you back the way you are - and you are not going to do that - I understand - I encourage you as well -

I know that you feel as if you have fallen backward but no - that's a feeling - your mother wants to order you about - not happening any more Outlander - you need to tell her that and walk off

You are working - dammit - and hard too - and I know telling your mother what's what is going to be hard

I care

Dec

I was on magnesium for a while before I went onto medications. I thought maybe it was something simple like a deficiency but obviously not.
Whats the vitamin B for? @Former-Member

@Owlunar
my mother and her bf esp are pains in the backside im telling you. They make me so frantic and half the time I think they enjoy me being like that tbh.
I dont know what they are trying to prove really- that im still unwell- well that doesnt take a gp to figure that out.

They might want me to be myself before all this happened but really I was this person before, they just never seemed to pick up on it. I dont think ill ever be the same, not like I was when I was a lot younger like 10yrs old. SA, grief, Trauma Witnessing, health issues, MH issues and hospitalisations as well as life things like getting a horse taken off me for 8 yrs and never see her again- how could anyone really.

I still feel like ive fallen backwards and not just ecasue of my mother. Ive fallen.
Im not the person who came out of hospital. The darkness has crept back in and its flooding in fast now. She still orders me about as does everyone else.

Yes im working. Not only on myself, but actual work plus trying to change things around me. Its so hard when im the only one expected to change and is changing. How can one person do everything.
And the old routine is already back. I knew it would as soon as the kids went back to school. We are only 2 days into it and everything is back the same

@outlander

@outlander

oh @eth nice to see you back! how are you?

hi @Shaz51 how have you been?

today was ok i suppose. i dont expect much else anymore. i find if i expect anything it backfires on me anyway.

ive done 12 hours of paddock cleaning in 3 days. im knackered.

ive got blisters at the bottom of each finger and in between my thumb and finger. its all from holding the rake. ive done alot of that too! but ill get a break in now until sunday