FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Something’s not right

Horrendous anxiety flare up

Horrendous anxiety flare up

I just needed a place to 'talk' about this. Help me work it thorugh a bit maybe. Forgive the wall of words.

I have had anxiety ranging from so severe that it kept me house bound, to a sort of ever present but manageable level for many years. Really started in childhood but was just chalked up to being 'shy', and then 'needy' and then 'difficult' and then 'bad work ethic' and so on.

For the last 10 years or so I am have been mostly able to cope, hold down jobs (albeit with a lot of 'sickies'), maintain a couple of freindships, and manage most elements of daily life most of the time. I am now at a point where I work for a great organisation in the mental health sector, so I can be upfront about WHY I need to have time off sometimes, and a job that has recently blossomed into a career path.

Woke up ths morning with terrible anxiety - mostly triggered by a couple of shitty things coinciding that are going to require me to do a lot more of the stuff that makes me super anxious than usual, as well as being upsetting in and of themselves.

Usually the day after a long weekend I get a bit of anxiety (m y routine is disrupted and the increased time away form work makes it very hard to go back sometimes), but it is at a level I can push through. Today is BAD and I am not gonna make it to work. I have let my boss know and it is ok. But I still feel like shit taking a day off immediately after a long weekend. Like I am taking the piss. And I have to get on top of it, because it can easily blow out of control, the more days of work I miss the less likely I am to be able to get back.

I feel really frustrated because my life is SO pared down. I hardly ever go out, I keep stimulus to a minimum, I take a battery of supplements, I have healthy practices in place, I have safety nets built in all over the place to ward off bad spells like this and they STILL bloody happen.

I want to be able to have a little bit more from life, not much, just a smidge, but I am already living right up to the line that I can manage, and over it sometimes. Over the weekend I was thinking wistfully of trying to start jogging again, something I love but which I have not had the spare emotional energy for quite a while. I was thinking about trying to find a psychologist to get some help for the billionth time, and about seeing a physio for my shoulder which needs rehab. I can't DO any of it. Can't actually face any of it right now. And this is the optional stuff. Right now I can't face the stuff that I do, absolutely need to do - which is also the main stuff upsetting me.

I get a spell like this and something has to give, something that matters to me, like work, or going to the gym or seeing a friend (something I only get to do once every couple of months anyhow) because I just don't have enough resources to handle it. And I don't have much left that I can cut down on.

I have already had to cut down my sessions with my trainer form 3 times a week to 2 times a week because I was not coping with having to leave the house on Saturdays - it was killing my weekend productivity (which then causes me major anxiety). I don't have anything except the gym left that I can cut out really and I really don't want to do that - I don't think I have anough oomph left in me to keep at it on my own. I am working on setting up a home gym (this involves a fairly major overhaul of the garage) so I can at least have a trainer come to me instead of having to go out, but because I have been so drained on weekends this is taking months and months. If I quit training now there is no telling how long it will take to get up again.

I get so frustrated feeling like 'nobody' gets it. 'Nobody' understands that I am pushing myself to the limit every single day that I make it out of the house, and even on the days that I don't make it. It is so god damned HARD sometimes, and I have so little to show for it. People don't realise what the little I have costs me to keep, the sheer number of things I have to give up just in order to be able to do what I can do and they are ALWAYS pushing me to do more in a million little ways that they don't even see as being significant because for them it is easy, so easy that it is invisible.

So I just wanted to post a bit of a whinge on here, where I know there are people who do 'get it', and maybe try to convince myself that I am not tanking my job and my life in one day over nothing.

178 replies

101 - 110 of 178
1...101112...18

In response to: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Hi @Former-Member
Like what you have written.
I'm running around doing some things so will get back to you. Thanks so much for your message, get back to you very soon :0)

In response to: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Funeral

Well the funeral went off without incident. It was actually quite lovely and joyous as well as sad. Grandma was very Christian and quite a few in the family also, so it was very religious and very uplifting and comforting for them, that was very clear. I got to learn quite a lot about her rather amazing life that I had never known before.

The burial was up in the Macedon ranges at a really lovely cemetery, and then we went to the local pub for food.

Though I had to make small talk with a tonne of people, many of whomI had no idea who they were (I am rather bad at recognising people comes from not looking at them and mostly that nking about how to get away I suspect!) I did not get anxiety at all. There were a couple of awkward moments, but no panic or anxiety, and I can even say it was a good day. If I had to go to work today I could without drama, but I have the day off, which is even better.

The other thing I handled well was being a passenger in the car on a very wet day. I get quite anxious as a passenger, I am always imagining crashes, and set weather makes it a lot worse. But I only had the mildest bit of anxiety about it and even fell asleep in the car!

I am constantly amazed at how much difference the meds have made for me, and that I fought tooth and nail daily to cope without them for 30 odd years. Still I learned so much about coping mechanisms, and my own headspace as a result it puts me in a strong position now. More resources are always better.

In response to: Funeral

Re: Funeral

Hi @chookmojo,

I am glad the medication is working for you, and you managed to go to such a big anxiety provoking even without incident, i wish you well for the future, by the sounds of it, it looks very bright.

Take Care

Jacques

In response to: Re: Funeral

Re: Funeral

Thanks @Jacques, at thank you for mentioning colouring books at the news agents, I didn't find a mandala one, but did find several nice ones.

In response to: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

At last @Former-Member
I can answer your message.
How are you ? How is your flu ? I've been mega mega busy but in bed now.
I can concentrate at last !

What you have typed and written isn't deep. Although I am not ' that old, ' I'm 47 years and truly believe that if you focus on helping ' like minded,' people, you are very silently.... Helping yourself and also learning how to care further for yourself.

So it feels like : to me : you might be able to find different support : how does having support workers in during the week just to say .......watch television with you ? You seem super clever to me.... But incredibly .... Worn out. Someone Like you ..... It just feels like ...... You have worked very hard to please others.
It feels like that if you can get your days into a routine ?
Have only colours around that you like ? I really like the colours blue and green. It feels like I'm going to be researching blue and green for my home but at last .....I've worked out how to make a blue and green headboard for my bed. Firstly. One day . I'm the future, ille go to an op shop and get a white bed sheet ...... Wax it up and batik it blue and green. Ille then get an old mattress ( thin ) and cut it to size and tape the batik material around the mattress and a thin board to make a headboard for my bed !

In response to: Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

I am sooooooooooo worn out, from 5 years isolated, in this house I call home, with this Chronic pain, :'( @PeppiPatty.
I love to make jewelry, yet when I go to make it I'm too tired & my hand hurts so bad, sometimes?....I just stop in mid stream. ( If I were swimming, I would probably drown? )
I don't like TV, too many abusive shows. I hate getting upset, or angry because of them.
I have hundreds of my own DVD'S, I love comedies. I giggle my head off, I'm sure neighbors can hear me.
I am a sucker for romance, as long as it's not abusive. I adore fantasy, I imagine myself there in it when I watch them, it's sometimes so amazing!!
When I was working I was far too mentally worn out to appreciate my DVD'S. I have a water bed, & I would come home from work & do what was needed to do. then I would go float on my water bed, & drift into my own little fantasy land world. I would pretend I were floating on a Lilly pad, on a pond. Wow, it was such a wonderful feeling, after 6 hours traveling. Three hours each way to work. The type of work that I did I loved. But, boy, oh boy, it was full on mentally.
I love your plan to make a bed board for your bed, you must be clever?
My colours are- Burgundy, pink, lavender, & I love gold, & silver, high lights. I have blue, & green in my bathroom.
Thank you so much for your care for me, you make me smile.
You are sweet!
Love,
Bella! 🙂

In response to: Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Hi @Former-Member

I love your pic I can see you swirling on your lily pond.

I also have chronic pain and gets very wearing.

What type of work did you?

In response to: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Omg getting ripples of the water it's a nice feeling on a water bed isn't it ?
Hello @Former-Member
Thank you for your message ! Thank you for calling me sweet !
I was never able to work ...... Until I discovered caring for individuals in the community. I find it very easy and fulfilling showing empathy. Probably because my youngest son was so ill for many years. He's better now.

I love making jewellery too and doing art and hand sewing. . I also get very tired and overwhelmed very easily. I need a lot of calm. But because of no pain, I work very hard on getting into the community. I also have Silver chain on cleaning and keeping up to date with my artwork I get 3 to 4 hours per fortnight social help.

Can you get your GP too understand this may be something that can assist you have a better daily life ?

Hope to hear from you soon /0) from Anne

In response to: Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

I am an, 'After Care worker', @Appleblossom.
I loved my job very much, I got to meet & talk to, so many gr8 people living independently from the hospital system, in group home situations. I collected data from the tenants ,to enable the living stand-eds to be studied & improved, for the people.
I have done many jobs in the area on MHS, over a period time. I started off voluntary, doing what ever I could, even if it were making lunches, & facilitating groups. I then trained @ the - Uni- for a number of years to become a, 'Research Assistant', in Psychology.

Now I'm a hidden, aching mess!

I think I will just sink to the bottom of the water bed, & stay there, & become a, tad pole!
Boo Hoo! :'(

In response to: Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

Re: Horrendous anxiety flare up

You are so caring, I really want to hug you!
I promise, I will talk to my, GP ASAP, maybe he will be half as caring as you are Anne, seriously! xo
101 - 110 of 178
1...101112...18