The Weekly Friday Feast

I feel so loved by my friends here.

Im so devestated because she has no idea how she affects past mental ill health issues in me and @LittleBuddha

But your all right......and my guts of what I learned ....that very little bit ........reminds me that you just gotta let em get through it.

But you know.....this is how Im thinking.......theres fires just one hour away from my home. In Yarloop, 131 homes burnt down. People without homes. Whats more important??

@CherryBomb today is Friday!!!

I have had a shitty week, so I took today off.

And I know it's early, but I've finished enough of the house-cleaning to stop feeling like a complete slob. And I'm stopping to eat, upon realising I haven't eaten other than a smoothie and an Up&Go since Monday... So I'm sitting down, watching "Hello Kitty Flanagan" on Netflix and eating a Vegimite and Cheese sandwich.

I have a "Performance Management Meeting" next week, so I needed to sit down and write down what I'd say. So stressed, and I have a PDoc appointment right before the meeting...

Horay for starting Friday Feast early @Crazy_Bug_Lady! Great minds think alike.

Sorry to hear about the lousy week. But I think it's great to have the day off. A wise move to take of you. I hope the lead up to your performance review is ok. I don't enjoy those things, but I usually find they're usually a lot worse in my head.

Sounds nice and cosy at your place. May I bring over a packet of Tim Tams, and ice cream and watch Hello Kitty Flanagan with you?

@CherryBomb it's not a Performance Review, at least not like the one's I've had before.

It's "a ,meeting to discuss our continuing concerns and agree on the actions required and the support you need to achieve the performance and behavioural standards required of you"

I tried to get an earlier appointment with my PDoc, but there was nothing available. So I have the PDoc appointment, get to work at 10.30, then have this meeting 11. I am terrified.

Tim Tams and company would be great.

Hey @Crazy_Bug_Lady, sounds like a tough gig coming. Glad to hear you have a vegimite sandwich, do you stop eating when you are really stressed? I do - and it strings me out even further, hard thing eating when you are wound tighter than a watch spring.

The meeting management has called that you describe as "meeting to discuss our continuing concerns and agree on the actions required and the support you need to achieve the performance and behavioural standards required of you" - do you ghave representation, you know you are entitled to have another person with you - if you are a Union member the workplace rep (or a Union official if no rep on site) or if not a Union member then a trusted workplace ally? We do NOT have to go into meetings alone, no matter what management might say... It doesn;t even have to be someone who works there, just someone on your side, a trusted ally, who is calm and focussed and can help conduct the meeting from your side. Something to think about...

In the mean time - if you have had some written feedback that is clear about the areas they are asking you to imporve on - try to spend some time with that document - and write out your OWN view on how well you have done, what might be infringing on improvements (not just your own health - but other workplace matters - like for instance if there is an unreasobable expectation that you attend lots of meetings and this gets in the eway of you conducting your job properly for instance (just an exapmple).

Look tooo at the areas of improvment they have requested - and write honestly what HAS imporved and what might not yet be at the standard they have asked - and try to think of two concrete steps you can take to reach those goals. For instance (not saying this is the real issue, just iusing an expample) if they have said something like, "Lacks focus" - you could come back and say - "to improve this area I will spend 5 minutes at the beginning of my shift getting clear about the things I have to do today and make a plan on how I will acheive that".

These things ARE stressful and do your head in on their own, and this kind of management process is MUCH kinder than the old being hauled over the carpet - but it is still iron fists in velvet gloves.

Maybe on the way back to work from the pdoc appointment - be clear and set the intention to be 100% present FOR YOURSELF at the meeting, representing your own best interests. Go over in your mind your plan for the meeting. Touc base again with the points you made about the various bits of your performance they are wanting to discuss, and when you walk in breathe in and out and remind yourself to keep breathing deeply, slowly.

I really hope it goes well for you, give it your very best shot.

@MoonGal I tend to stop eating when I'm stressed or whatever. It's not intentional, I just forget to eat. And then I take days to work out why I feel so tired and bleh.

There's no one else that can go, I'm not part of a Union. I spoke to my dad, I called him when I got the email about the meeting. I was in an absolute panic. And all he says is "calm down, it's just a meeting. You are a grown-up, so it would look silly if I come".

I've managed all these meeting by myself, and I will manage this one too. I just wanted someone to say it'd be okay.

@Crazy_Bug_Lady - it will be okay. We all go through this stuff and come out the other side. If you are only taking yourself with you - then take all of yourself with you and leave panic, fear and worry at the door, they are not helpful advocates...

Hi Crazy_Bug_Lady.

Im a moderator here at the forums and wanted to reiterate @MoonGal's sentiments.

It may feel like there is noone to go with you, but i encourage you to have a good think, there may be someone - and it can be anyone. A friend, neighbour, colleague, family etc. And they are simply support people who do not necessarily need to know the whole story. They are not required to engage with your workplace colleagues, but simply 'be' with you. Something to think about.

You can ask for written information about the workplace concerns before the meeting. And you are entitled to documentation of what occurred in the meeting. Legally, you do not have to sign it if they ask. But this way you have documentation and can prepare yourself for meetings in the future.

But this sounds all very serious, I am sure that everything will be fine, its just the lead up that is so darn hard. If you are finding eating difficult (stress does that) try protein drinks from the supermarket until you feel like eating again.

I hope this helps and Ill be thinking of you for your meeting. Take care