14th year house bound

Hey Karen i just posted some questions, ignore them, we posted at the same time.

I think it would be wise to do the exploratory surgery, to make sure their is nothing wrong, but if it is Croup, maybe it has to d owith her birthday last week and fathersday being so close.

It must be so hard for you seeing your little one like that, I hope someone is able to treat the symptoms so she can at least not get the Croup again.

Good on you, yes the centrelink forms are very confusing, i am sure you did your best, wow you are doing fantastic on your own, doing so much, i could not do what you have doen so far, please feel proud of yourself, i know i am proud of you.

i hope your treating team meeting went well, i know how much you dread it, you poor thing, you must be so exhausted, i hope you manage some rest tonight.

I am thinking of you my angel.

Jacques

It certainly was a big day. I hope tomorrow is better. @hiddenite

Thanks for the image of lambs running around @Jacques

Hi Anne

It sure has been an overwhelming week.

I hope you are doing ok.

Karen

Hey Jacques

We must have been thinking of one another.... great minds think alike.

I took my daughter to an ear nose and throat specialist, he said exploratory surgery at Monash hospital. He also said it could be stress related. It has been really stressful the last couple of weeks, with her birthday and fathers day. School production.

Anyway I'm glad you got to catch up on some sleep.

My treating team still want me back in the menu, but that will just traumatise the girls further. I will battle on. I'm really trying to do my best.

Karen

Lol's about the great minds, i think we care for each others well being, i suppose that is what friends do.

Yes it could be stress related, i know mum throws up when she is stressed and coughs a lot, when the stress is gone she has no symptoms, it can be amazing how mental stress can show in physical symptoms. I hope she is going to get back to normal soon, maybe when she gets the symptoms, play some soothing music, and find some essential oils she likes, remember the sensory box, it may work for her too, i know i have some relaxing music on my smart phone and it really does work calming me down, it may work for her too.

I think under all the stress you are under you are coping extremely well, i know things are still tough, but it is nice to see you focusing on the house, the girls and focusing on the future, you have not been able to do these things before, yes you have your down days, but they seem to be becoming less and less.

I am so proud of you Karen, i can't believe how far you have come, i feel so honoured to be in your presence, you are such a kind, gentle soul, thank you for being my friend.

Jacques

Hey Jacques

You are too kind, if you knew the thoughts I battle every day you may not see me that way.

I fight another day because a stranger decided that I was worth being kind to, and help me while he is fighting his own battles.

Jacques I've watched you go on your first holiday in many years. Face challenges head on, find a way to get through when you didn't think it was possible. Renovating a house, gardening, unconditionally looking after his mum. You are a selfless, kind, compassionate, caring person, who I greatly admire.

You are a true friend J.

My Angel,

Guess what, i have the same thoughts as you, self loathing, SI, worthlessness, etc. Karen we battle on every day, me included, you would be terrified of me if you knew what i thought, my mind is like a huricane, swirling violently so many negative thoughts. Karen i know what you think, because i think the same things, Please never feel alone or like you are the only one, i have to fight SH and SI daily, i know you do too.

Karen you are a sweet woman, you deserve so much more out of life, i know one day you will, we just need to lean on each other until you get their.

Karen you have just brought a tear to my eye, what beautiful words, thank you.

My angel i can see you will get past all of the negative thoguhts, one day you will be happy, i know it sounds like a far out concept, but i know you will succeed, you are so strong, fighting every day, the strength in you i see is something amazing, it takes enormous courage to face the adversities you have and survive.

people speak about heros in their life, celebraties, public figures, etc. Karen you are my hero, you show me how to fight on, that things are not so bad, that their are nice people out their. who knows one day i might be able to leave the house and actually speak to someone without fear.

Jacques

I forget that you and I share the unfortunate thoughts and other stuff. It just feels like I'm the only one this is happening to. I feel so selfish.

No one should have the struggles we do, society doesn't understand. I feel that I'm just talking to my self when I meet with my treating team, the blank looks on their faces you can tell that they have no idea. None of them have experienced what we do on a daily basis.

How can we be helped without the understanding of others.

It's so frustrating.

Even the girls it is so hard to find the help and support, and understanding.

Jacques having you understand me means so much. Thank you.

Karen

Please My angel don't feel selfish, i think that is why we get on so well, we both know what each other is going through.

I agree i have had the same thing, they don't know how to respond or what to do because they don't understand, my mother says she can never know what it is like for me becasue she has never experianced it. Karen we can support each other, we know what to say to each other and trust each other.

Karen i would trust you with my life if it ever came to it, i trust you that much, i have never put trust in anyone, i always push people away, but not you, i have never trusted anyone until now. please see how much you mean to me, you have saved me on several occasions.

That is a shame, for the girls, i hope the love and support you give them will be enough to overcome their anxiety problems, please give it time, they are young, they still have a chance to recover, everything is still raw for them and you, time does not heal, but the pain lessens over time.

Hang in their my angel, things can only get better.

Jacques

Jacques that means so much to me that you have allowed me into your heart and trusted me.

You are the only one I have let in, I feel I can be completely honest and know that you will understand me and not judge.

You have accepted me unconditionally and in my 43 years I have never had that, never felt cared for, or accepted. My family have never shown me the kindness that you have.

J you are an awesome friend I feel so lucky to have you in my life.

Remember you are never alone my friend

Take care and goodnight

Karen