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14th year house bound

14th year house bound

Hi Everyone,

I am new hear, after being removed from other mental health forums for my depressive thoughts i thought i would give this forum a try, this is my story.

I am 33 live with my mother, i am almost compeatly housebound, i leave my house once in the morning for a walk at 6am and maybe once during the week, both times i leave the house fill me with great anxiety, i have no friends, (the last friend i had was in 2001), i have never had a job, never had a girlfriend and never been able to leave my parents side, my father died in 2001 and i have always suffered seperation anxiety the last time i had a night away from home was 1994 for one night (parents had to pick me up at midnight because i was so frantic).

I have spent most of the past 14 years in my room, or the shed, never much out of the yard, no one in my town knows me, people stare and ask each other behind my back if any one knows who i am.

I have only had an income for the past year and spend the previous 7 with no income at all, mum had to use all of her life savings to allow me to live with her and she now has nothing.

I only want to live long enough to care for her in her old age and then i plan to take my own life, i knew from an early age my life would turn out like this, but had no idea how horrible it would be, every day is the same, i often wonder why i keep going, i have very little contact with family (maybe once a year) and i am really struggling to keep going.

Please don't feel distressed about what i am saying, and i am so sorry if i have offended anyone, it is just how i feel.

Their is so much more, but i will leave it at that for the moment, i am shaking and the anxiety is kicking in so thankyou for reading and i will add more later.

Jacques

2719 replies

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In response to: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Morning my angel,

Well i spent the night in a huge state of panic, i tossed and turned, i got up this morning with a masive upset stomach, my head is still spinning, i can't believe what an effect it has on me seeing someone i know.

i hope you managed some rest last night Karen, i was wondering, no need to respond if you don't want to, but why are you still letting your husbands mother call you, i think it is time you changed your phone number and stoped contact with her. just my opinion. remove the toxic people from your life Karen.

I am here if you need support, unconditionally, take care my friend. my thoughts are with you.

Jacques

In response to: Re: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Hi Jacques

Well it's a new day the sun is up the birds are out.

I'm sorry you had a bad night, it's probably to be expected you are so distressed and in a dark place.

I think your advitar shows how dark things are.

Yes IBS does flare up with such distressing days, mine is awful here, can't get a break.

Plan to distract

Be kind to yourself j

Karen

In response to: Re: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Hi My angel,

I am planing to plant some plants today for distraction, keep busy, you are right, make sure you do the same.

Yes the IBS is so bad, how can their be such severe physical symptoms from a mental problem, i don't understand.

Karen you too, i will be thinking of you today, you are my rock, thank you for everything, you are my best friend.

Jacques

In response to: Re: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Jacques I'm worried about you.

You are never far from my mind I draw strength from your kindness.

I am glad you will be outside I hope it's a sunny day.

Yea the IBS after suffering with it for 15 years all I can say it's our body showing how distressed we are. Emotionally we cannot find a healthy release, unable to cry ...... so our body give it's own release. Not much different than shaking, chest pains, hard to breathe.

IBS would be more inconvenient and degrading.

You are in my thoughts Jacques

Stay safe

Karen

In response to: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Hi my angel,

I am worried about you too, I am shaking so bad at the moment, we had to go back into town this morning, mum got a medical appointment, I am so numb, so lost.

Karen the IBS is so bad today, I have not had it like this since Christmas.

I feel horrible today, I woke up this morning in such a panic I was almost paralysed by fear of waking up.

How are you this morning Karen, you made another night, Karen it almost brings me to tears knowing you are in such a horrible place. I would fall to peices.

Hang in their Karen I am with you sending a hug. Thank you for being my friend

Jacques

In response to: Re: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Oh Jacques that must have been so triggering for you. That is just awful.

It's no wonder you are shaking.

Next time you are in town the chemist will have a cheaper brand of medication you can buy off the shelf it's main ingredient is what Chris spoke about. It is recommended by specialist and the only thing that will help a little.

As I said 15 years and there is nothing out there that helps better.

Keep fighting Jacques

Break you day down

Maybe another hot shower

BREATHE

Breathing meditation

Walking meditation

Tara

Mandalas

The girls and I have done ours today

Distract

I'm always around if you need to vent

Oh Jacques if I could cry I would...... if only

Take care stay safe

Karen

In response to: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Thank you Karen, I will check the chemist out.

I am watching my breathing closely, taking regular deep breaths.

How are you going? What have you and the girls got planed for this afternoon?

In response to: Re: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

I'm glad j it will make a difference to the quality of your daily life.

Great to hear that you are still breathing, I got a bit worried after last night:-)

The girls have planned another afternoon at the beach.

I'm struggling to top things off mum is making comments in front of the girls about my weight, me being medicated, the fact that my hair is too long and make me look old.

If I could let someone close to me l would gladly get my hair cut.

I hate her putting me down in front of the girls I feel humiliated, worthless, and ashamed. She even make fun of me because of how many times I have to use the toilet.

I hate being me, hopeless and pathetic.

In response to: Re: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Hi Karen, i am feeling a little more settled this afternoon, frightened, but settled.

Yes Karen, i have to watch myself, i seem to start hyperventalating without realising it, so i force myself to take a deep breath to slow it down.

it should be nice at the beach Karen, seeing your girls with a smile on their faces must make you so happy.

You need to tell your mother to back off, she sounds so nasty, she sounds no better than your late husband, she is an abuser.

Karen have you thought about finding a hairdresser that works from home, most of them only have one client their at a time, if you can find one and get through the first couple of appointments, you may find you get comfortable with her, mum used to see a hairdresser like this, it was good.

Karen you do not need to explain why you can't get your hair cut, it would not matter to me, you are you, and i am ok with that, i would never judge you, i totally understand, i can't even stand my own family touching me.

Karen i am going to repeat this again because i know you need to hear it over and over.

I am strong.

I am loved.

I am wanted.

I have friendships.

I have hope.

I have a future.

I deserve repect.

I deserve love.

I deserve hope.

I deserve kindness.

I hope this afternoon is better for you, i am here for you anytime.

Jacques

In response to: Re: 14th year house bound

Re: 14th year house bound

Hello Hiddenight,

Those things your mother is saying is not very nice, my suggestion is to reply with lots of positive remarks. "oh thanks mum, i guess every one has a right to their opinion dont they" ( with a big grin).

Im so glad you got to go to the beach too- im very excited to be getting the warmer weather now 😄

Baboo

1,161 - 1,170 of 2,719