I don't know how much longer I can last.

I'm not seeing the psychiatrist until June, and the same for my psych. If I need to I'll speak to my GP about it, but I'll try and put it off until then.

I'm just over it all... I am doing quite literally everything I can to deal witih my MI, and I am trying to be patient with myself. But then stuff like this happens. As if I don't feel horrible enough already.

@Crazy_Bug_Lady good one putting back to HR. They should also be advising you of what your rights are.

Exactly @-karma- All I received was an email from my boss saying "(HR) has requested you please sign and return the attached form to me"

I can't see anyone just filling out a form like that and sending back no questions asked.

I read and re-read my reply to make sure it didn't come across as rude or anything, just asked why, and said that I wasn't comfortable with my employers having open access.

I am kinda curious to see what their answer is tomorrow. In the meantime, I'm trying not to worry about it.

So I got a reply from HR. Still not impressed with their answer. I am gonna forward it onto my psychiatrists office to see what the deal is.

The note the psychiatrist gave me as far as I see I simply to cancel the meeting I had originally planned. HR's response is "...if you are unfit to participate in meetings then your fitness to perform the duties associated with your role is called into question and raises significant concerns." So I'm quite unimpressed.

I think what's confusing me the most is that if I had attended the meeting and not gotten a certificate, I would have had a panic attack, cried the entire time, and been quite unresponsive. All in all, completely useless in attending.

I finally take a step towards finally dealing with my MI and this is what happens. Which is then where I start questioning why I even bother existing. Clearly I cause trouble everywhere, and it seems clear to me that everyone would be better of without me.

The psychiatrist told me to up my meds, so I am currently tired and my head is foggy and I feel bleh. Which I suppose in this situation is alost a bonus. I am currently too tired to even care. Too tired to even feel bad about this.

@Crazy_Bug_Lady , my goodness, I'm appalled! This is the LAST thing you need.

It really upsets me when I hear about workplaces making life difficult for people! It just doesn't make sense! Don't managers/HR/employers understand? well + happy + safe staff = productive staff member *end rant*

I noticed some suggestions from @Alessandra1992 and @CherryBomb in previous posts about organisations that might be able to support you. I don't know what line of work or industry you're in, but is it possible to contact a union?

Could your GP or the psychiatrist write a medical certificate confirming that you are competent to do your role?

Glad you came on tonight... & I'm so sorry that this is happening.. no one deserves this.

Thank @NikNik

I've emailed just emailed my psychiatrist's office, and if I don't hear back from them tomorrow I will pop in to see my GP on the weekend (if he's in).

I've also passed the email onto my stepmum. Which was awkward, as I had to explain the entire thing to her (I've not really talked to them about this). But she works in a lawfirm, so she can ask some of the lawyers for me.

This whole thing blows.

I'm gonna eat dinner and watch Doctor Who. I am gonna try not to think about it too much tonight.