Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

47,612Members
1,358,869Posts
1,400,000Visitors

Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

NikNikSenior Contributor02 May 2017, 11:31 am AEST

Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

For Topic Tuesday this week, @Former-Member and I will be hosting a session for people who are caring for men who aren't caring for themselves.

Whether it be your partner, brother, friend or son, it can be tough when someone you care about won't seek help.

Join us from 7pm AEST to be part of the discussion - ask questions, learn some tips and most importantly, be around others who are going through the same thing.

Two things you can do now

1) Hit 'Like' below to get an email notification on the night

2) Can't make the session? Leave your question below to be answered on the night

83 replies

21 - 30 of 83

1 2 3 4...9

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Shaz51Senior Contributor27 June 2017, 7:29 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Ammmm @NikNik, that is tricky xx

I would say 3, 4, because he wants to , we talk about it and do planning but it all falls through with him making all sorts of excuses , hopes this makes sense @Former-Member

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

JayArCasual Contributor27 June 2017, 7:30 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

That model is very helpful and No1 son is definitely at contemplation. Sometimes taking action, but its definitely not regular or consistent yet. Do we push, encourage or let him continue on his own?

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

NikNikSenior Contributor27 June 2017, 7:30 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Makes sense @Shaz51 - sounds like he's drifting between the stages.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Shaz51Senior Contributor27 June 2017, 7:31 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

that is a good question @JayAr

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

NikNikSenior Contributor27 June 2017, 7:33 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Great question @JayAr
I think we have to consider our conversations as to what stage they are in. It looks like we have most people whose loved ones are around the 1-3 mark.

Pebbles is going to touch on conversation tips soon, so that might be helpful JayAr

Do any other members have thoughts on JayAr's question in the meantime?

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

soulSenior Contributor27 June 2017, 7:36 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

I think the guys get stuck at those early stages because they don't believe that their mental illness is as bad as it really is.

They don't see the effects it has on themselves and especially those around them.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Unknown userMember27 June 2017, 7:36 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

That's a good point @JayAr it can be hard to know what to do and when. I think it's important to remember that everyone's situation is unique however I wonder if looking at ways in which we can can help our loved ones when they are resistant could be helpful.

One of the best things we can do if we’re concerned about someone’s mental health is talk to them and encourage them to seek the support of mental health professionals.

Starting this kind of discussion is not always easy, can anyone share their experience of what has been helpful or not helpful in starting such conversations?

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Sissy88Senior Contributor27 June 2017, 7:39 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

With @JayAr question I think it's always better to encourage people not to dwell or wallow in their problem as it feeds it and becomes worse. As parents we can only try our best, once they become adults it's harder to help. My parents both had personality disorders and as children we had to suffer them as adults it leads to dysfunctional behaviour and lack of communication which just adds to the problem and frustration

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Maggs52Casual Contributor27 June 2017, 7:40 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

My son just gets angry whenever I suggest he needs some help. He has friends who have tried to advise him that he needs rehab but ignores them as well.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

JayArCasual Contributor27 June 2017, 7:42 pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Caring for men who don't care about themselves // 27 June, 7pm AEST

Thats a good point Soul - or in our case small steps are taken which are seen as it being 'fixed', rather than seriously considering and planning taking the right type of action that will have long lasting effects. And understanding that there is no 'quick fix'. Its 2 steps forward and 1 step back and it's highly frustrating (which in itself is guilt inducing).

21 - 30 of 83

1 2 3 4...9