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stop justifying myself

Change123Senior Contributor27 Apr 2017, 2:44 pm AEST

stop justifying myself

Hi All and @Former-Member @AshEasy

I'm on a mission to stop justifying myself in the future, this is definitely something I need to stop.

I would like to ask that if anyone see's me putting in a justification post to please call me out.

But not only that I wanted you all to know so if you think something I say comes across incorrectly its because I'm trying to not justify myself. I also will stop giving reasons why I'm having a break from the forum, its always the same thing trying to curb forum land addiction so I dont want anyone to think I'm being rude - just going to try and not justify myself.

OMG I was just about to justify again, its so ingrained in me this will be a definite challenge! But I'm up for it!!

Will try from today and over the weekend to not justify myself to anyone unless of course they ask like work. Let you know how I go next week. I will do the same principles as before with my emotional disciplines and reward myself on Monday night once I have achieved this. Notice I said " I will achieve" I know I can do this.

Have a good weekend guys!

6 replies

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In response to: stop justifying myself

Change123Senior Contributor27 Apr 2017, 2:52 pm AEST

Re: stop justifying myself

In response to: Re: stop justifying myself

Unknown userMember27 Apr 2017, 4:53 pm AEST

Re: stop justifying myself

I find this one a hard one as well @Change123

a hard skill to learn I think and I've been a queen of it and still am. I think though that it works best when we pick it up ourselves because strangely enough it has a whole life of its own when others pick us up. I think it's great to work on though. I know I'm in a deep hole emotionally when I'm scrambling to justify myself and it never ends well. Just my thoughts. 💜🤗

In response to: Re: stop justifying myself

Change123Senior Contributor27 Apr 2017, 4:59 pm AEST

Re: stop justifying myself

Thanks @Former-Member

Yes I get worse when I'm emotionally not in a good place but I think with me its become a terrible habbit as well as I have done this all my life and 50 years of breaking a habit will be hard but I'm gonna give my best! I do this without thinking even when I'm in a good way.

In response to: Re: stop justifying myself

Unknown userMember27 Apr 2017, 5:02 pm AEST

Re: stop justifying myself

Me too @Change123. Same time frame. I only learned last year how badly it affects me. I'm better than I was but slip up all the time still. One day at a time 😊

In response to: stop justifying myself

Unknown userMember27 Apr 2017, 6:47 pm AEST

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In response to: -

Change123Senior Contributor02 May 2017, 10:30 am AEST

Re: stop justifying myself

Hi @Former-Member@Former-Member and everyone else

Well what a disaster the weekend was!

Not only did I start justifying myself that night but then my partner was extremely stressed with a few issues around the home mounting up and finally on the weekend he snapped and blew up at me. He blamed everything on my BPD (his stresses) which I know isnt all my fault. He doesnt deal well with stress and when it mounts up if I do anything wrong or just annoying he uses that as an outlet to me. So while he was freaking out at me yelling etc - I turned around and said yes I hve BPD but notice I'm not the one yelling and carrying on. I was in a very bad place Sunday and yesterday but worked through it on my own.

Things a little better at home, we didnt talk last night and just gave each other space so hopefully partner is on the mend now.

Even though I failed miserably on the justification I'm happy that I was able to pull through yesterday without support. It was a very emotional day, not only was I stressing about my parnter, my senile boss started on me (an employee had blamed me for something that I didnt do) and then I had to speak to an employee's father, who son (employee) was in a horrific car accident 6 months ago and has rendered him a quadraplegic - he broke down crying to me so as you can imagine yesterday was a very emotional day.

Today is a new day and ready to start all over again - no justifying - let you know how it goes

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