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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Former-Member 😔💗💕

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

😙💟💕 @CheerBear 🐻🐉🐞🐝🐛🐌

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Former-Member ❤🌷⚘🌻🌼🌺🌹💐🌸

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Checking in to see how you are going @Former-Member - thinking of you

...and @CheerBear and @Former-Member

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I'm so sorry for your loss @Former-Member

Thinking of you

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Had a huge cry @Zoe7 💜
Now I just want to sleep, but I'll try and wait until bedtime.
Thanks for asking. 😙
Leftover roast for dinner.
Nice and easy.

How's your day been?

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Thanks @NikNik 💗💕
Still hard to believe.
Fur babies are exactly that, our babies. 💜🐱

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

You let out some of your grief by crying - that is not a bad thing at all @Former-Member

Crying is so draining so it is no wonder you want to sleep - trying to wait until bedtime is a good thing if you can make it Bella!

I want to come to your place - leftover roast dinner would be perfect tonight - I really don;t feel like cooking and I don't have the energy (or money) to go out to get something - maybe soup as my throat is still really sore and it is hard to swallow.

My day has been ok - been on and off here. I did rake up the leaves but just about collapsed after - did too much again - I'm a naughty little butterfly lol

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Former-Member, I'm so sorry.

I'd be devestated if I lost my kitty.

Pets are wonderful friends and such a support when we're unwell.

Thinkiing of you and your wonderful kitty. ❤️ 🐱

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Ouch! Your throat sounds realy sore @Zoe7 💜
Do you gargle with iodised salt?
I thought I'd cried all my tears, but no.

I guess it brought back memories of how my dad suffered for years before he went.
I hate people/pets suffering.
Watching my sister deteriorate now too.
She's the only sibling I have contact with.
Sometimes life doesn't make sense, but somehow we have to try and find the positives.
Good on you for getting the raking done.
I know how frustrating it is to have little energy. So many things to do, no energy = super frustration.


Thankyou @Former-Member 💜
She was special.
It was comforting having her here while home alone all day.
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