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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear Hi there. I thought of you when I got up this morning, and wished some little wishes, though I know that isn't at all helpful. Sometimes all you can do is let someone know you are thinking of them. 🌺🌷

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Maggie thank you heaps. I caught your wishes and felt them as I got our of bed. They really are helpful. Hope your coffee and sunrise have been good this morning 💗

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear I've just finished watering my garden, ready for the big heat. It's already 21 here, really unusual, headed for 34. Golly gosh, this is the biggest heatwave I've experienced here in Tassie.

Im glad you caught those wishes, and I'm hopeing some small smiles come your way today.

Coffee time here.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hi @Maggie @CheerBear Very warm and muggy here - 21 already. BOM keep promising rain but it doesn't come, so I'll be doing some watering soon too. Take it easy if poss.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

The heat can hard @Maggie! Has it been humid there? We get hot days in summer but not usually with high humidity. It's forecast for around 40 with over 70% humidity today. I'm not loving the sweaty, sticky, thick air this summer :S .

Hope your garden is coping ok. I will water my pot plants which is all that is slightly holding on through this sun, after I finish my coffee. Coffee definitely came first for me this morning 😉

Edit to add good morning to @frog and sending you rain wishes. Hope your garden is going well also 🙂

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear Definately humid this morning, unusual for here. 40 OMG, that's just so hot.

Enjoy your coffee before LF wake up. Hope the flood is manageable.

@frog Promises of rain here also come to nothing, tomorrow rain is forcast, we need it, the state is burnt and dry. Stay cool if you can.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Thanks @Maggie ☺ It's the quiet before the LF storm!

I was reading through The Mighty yesterday and found a story, not long after you posted a quote about saying "I'm fine". It's titled 26 things people with MI mean when they say "I'm tired". I found it helpful to read words that "I'm tired" can mean to me sometimes, that I wouldn't necessarily say to many. I'm not sure if it's something that you'd want to read but I'll link it just in case, as it kind of goes with the "I'm fine" thing. If you're interested it's here (and totally ok if you're not or you don't want to read ☺)

Better start tackling a flood (it's all mopped up now but we can't use the cupboard anymore and I'm thinking it will be water again the moment I use the sink to wash the dishes. Big grrrr). Dish by dish is how I will do this - one tiny moment at a time. While I look for and hope to find a wand 😉

You brightened my morning, thank you. Hope you stay cool today too 💗

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear Thanks, I just read through the quotes. Humm, scary stuff, I'm always fine, fighting back tears at the same time. MI is cruel. I wonder what fine actually feels like!!!!. Anyway, hope your flood is deminishing, and your day has a smile or two or three.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I wonder that sometimes too @Maggie, especially when I'm in the middle of it being hard. When I think of fine I think of moments like sitting under the tree and hearing birds, or watching littles play and not thinking about anything else, or coffee in the quiet still of the morning with a sunrise.

I hear you though, and believe things are really hard for you often, and fine is not so much existent. Lots of hugs for you.

My day has had a surprising amount of smiles thanks, mostly from foruming rather than working on the mess. If only I could actually live in a nest 😉 Still I am smiling though (then freaking out a bit but then smiling again). Rollercoaster.

Really probably should keep on keeping on with this. I'll see if I can "encourage" some helpers with the promise of icy poles maybe. And maybe reward myself with forum visits for little jobs done.

Sending you a virtual big shady tree and cool drink 💗

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Did someone here order a big shady tree and cool drink ?

@CheerBear @Maggie

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