Connect with people who understand what you are going through,
seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're
free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.
I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.
In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.
Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.
I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.
Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.
I'm going back that post where I was ok and I will stay there. I'm going to be ok. I will not tip over at the finish line. It was a hiccup. It's not right that this happens but it's a fight for another day. Today's fight is to stay calm and chill and start to prepare everything for the break.
Sorry, i can't stand it when I meltdown here. I'm so over it all now. I feel like I've been dragged through enough since life all changed. 3 days can't come soon enough.
In response to: I'm in a nest
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
Wanna play a game @CheerBear
In response to: I'm in a nest
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
I'm so full of frustration and exhaustion and nerves that I think I have to have a shower and calm myself back down before I can play with anyone sorry but thanks heaps for offering @outlander. I'll be ok again soon, just have to take some time to settle and get back to that mindset where I have some hope that it's going to be ok once I get to the break place. I've done two weeks of ridiculousness and months of some of the hardest stuff I could imagine. I can do three more days.
My head hurts a lot and I'm very tired.
In response to: Re: I'm in a nest
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
ok @CheerBear sending you as many virtual hugs as you need!
yes your alot stronger than you think you are. i think you can most certainly be proud of what you have achieved already and imagine how good youll feel after 3 more days.
In response to: I'm in a nest
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
I've had a shower and feel less like I want to fight that now. I have to spend the next three days organising everything and I'm feeling really overwhelmed. It's like there's a massive wall between where I am and three days from now. I have to keep holding myself together until I can get to the place where it's ok to not be so ok for a little while but it seems so far away. I've started a list and I feel like giving up already. I feel like I've been running a race and have fallen down right at the end and I know I have to pick myself up and keep going but I don't know where I am going to get the energy to do it. This is the start of the whirlpool I have created by wanting to step out of the ocean for a while and it is about to get much harder before there's a chance it will get easier. I'm so tired and there's so much to do 😞
In response to: I'm in a nest
PepsimaxSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
Hi @CheerBear I don't know whether to laugh or cry or scream at the catt team not laugh at you what a f**ken mess they are thinking of you it will be good for you to have a break just keep plugging away Pepsimax
In response to: I'm in a nest
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
Haha thanks @Pepsimax💛 Even if I am not sure of too much at the moment, I am sure this break is the right thing now 🙂
In response to: I'm in a nest
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
In the nest there will be a place for a turtle to crawl in and sit if they want to, or a pocket waiting if they decide it is right to be in. To sit and just be. Alone but in the company of someone who gets it, even if they're here but not here. Not trying to fix. Not saying it will get better. Not diving in and creating more mess. Respecting and recognising that things are probably really not ok right now.
There's also someone who likes purple and someone who always has cakes and coffee who are in my heart tonight, as I sit in the nest they've sat in with me.
Tonight for me another something little happened that's added more to more than I can take now. I am so worn out that moving off the lounge seems impossible. I know that all I can do tonight is keep on keeping on and I know that has to be enough for me tonight.
I will hope and trust that these others also know that whatever it is they're doing to keep on keeping on too, is also enough.
We're improving how you access SANE services, starting with Forums
You’ll soon be able to use one secure login to access all SANE services.
For added security, members are now required to log in with their email address and password - member names are no longer supported for logging in.
If you had a Forums account before 19 May 2026 and haven’t set up your new login yet, you'll be prompted to set up your new secure login when you sign-in.