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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Maggie - your message made me smile heaps thank you 🙂 Breaking things kind of does feel good sometimes doesn't it?

I love the idea that you'll be standing with me by the door, thank you. Maybe I can imagine an invisible army next to me 🙂

I hope you enjoy your garden today. I may have to dive into that nettle without the astronaut suit ugh. I knew I should have done that yesterday morning! Oh well.

Hope the sun is shining and the coffee is good 💗

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I'm happy to join the invisible army too if you'd like @CheerBear and @Maggie.

Rental stuff and housing stuff is way up there on my list of things that stress me out, and it really sucks that they're not respecting your rights and are adding more stress on you right now.

My old housemate once stopped an inspection from happening. We never saw a notice - mail was getting stolen from along our street at the time so it's possible it may have been lost that way - and one day they just showed up while she was home. She told them they couldn't come in, and would have to organise another time with the proper notification period. So it's do-able and I'll back you up. Just don't ask me to start the mower!

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@TheVorticon Lol.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear Every flower stands alone but can bring joy to so many through it's beauty and grace - much like a little CB I know

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

You guys 😊 Thank you!

Guess what? I won in the CB vs the mower battle and now have (half) of a yard mowed! Looks so great (and so does the sparkly shiny blue mower) ☺ About to make some lunch and then get stuck into the back and the dodgy nettle pit (shudder).

@TheVorticon - so glad you'll back me too 😜 Thank you! @Zoe7 - big warm fuzzies and love that pic @Maggie 💗

Hope the day is going ok for all.

☕🍰 for @Former-Member (and anyone else who may want some too)

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

way to go @CheerBear

Hello @Zoe7, @Maggie, @TheVorticon, @Mazarita

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hi @CheerBear, hearing you regarding the illegal entry notice. I have denied entry before to real estate agents coming in without proper notice. Standing in that invisible support gang behind you! Hugs sister.

Hi @Shaz51, my scottish sister. Hope you are travelling okay today.

Hi everyone here, sending wishes for good stuff in the day to each of you too.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Mazarita - I had a feeling you may have had some experience with a similar thing before too. Go you 💪 Was it scary? Thank you also. I'm loving the idea of me standing on the porch facing whoever may rock up, with a gang/army behind/beside me that only I can see ☺ That feels way better than totally on my own.

Thanks @Shaz51 also. I read you were unwell 🙁 I hope the rest day helps and you're feeling better soon.

Better get back to it ☺

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

hello @Mazarita, my scottish sister

Got a kidney infection and gastro which started last night , we both have it today xx

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