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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Storm gone.
Yes, wish I could share photos of the occasion @CheerBear
Night night, sleep well 😴💟

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hi @Former-Member .... 🌹💕

My D3 is on a gap year, doing clerical work for our current home-based business. She is not too sure what she wants to do beyond that yet. I think just being releavec that she has graduated, and now earning some money, is enough for the moment.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Former-Member My fur baby is a small chihuahua dog. I found her at the RSPCA four years ago, she had been abused. It took her some time to settle, but we are the best of mates now. She's my lifeline.

I don't socialise at all, I'm lonely/alone in a crowd, stay home too. I'm never boared though always doing something if I can. I have one kind of friend, that's it. Hope you have a goodish day.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

That's good re gap year @Faith-and-Hope
D would have a gap year if I travel with her 😮😣😨 Gosh! I can barely get out of the house.
I suggested working for a break, before starting uni, but she'd rather study towards a career. It's a huge decision re uni courses. Especially when not sure what career she would love. Gap year would be good. Lucky D3 can work in your business. 😊👍💕
I discovered that my passport is still valid, just sorting renewing D's passport. Hers was only valid 5 years, mine is 10.
I hope you have a nice day today. Sunny here, very warm. I'm still in pj's. Not a good sleep at all, but hope to get out later.🌹🌼🌹




I'm so glad you have your furbaby @Maggie
I only socialise if it's forced on me. 😮😊
Having a teenager forces me out. I would hude away otherwise. 😀
I hope you have a nice relaxing day. 💕🌹🌼🌹



How are you and LF? @CheerBear 💟👋☕🍰
I had to put a roast in the oven before use by date.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hide not hude 😀 @Maggie
Re above message

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Good morning @Former-Member and @Maggie ..... 🤗💕

Yes Bellla3, it is good in one way that D3 is working with us. In our situation it gives us the ability to travel without having to work around her work commitments, and with S2 not at uni at the moment either, we have that flexibility .,.,, but both are also not well within our circumstances. D3 is having a lot, and I mean a lot, of days missed from work owing to illness and injury. She is not coping with the stress of our circumstances, but it means that she wouldn't be coping in the outside working world either.

Still, it is what it is for us until it changes .....

I am glad you have your fur-baby too @Maggie ..... we moved to a new small town when I was 15yo ..... I was only at home from school for the holidays, but my fur-baby was my only friend at that stage. I was feeling too vulnerable to want to make new friends there.

Enjoy preparing for the formal with D Bella3 .... special moments .....

💜

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hi lovely people 🙂

@Former-Member - LF are tired, cranky, feeling blegh but on the mend I think. Thanks for asking. We're getting out this afternoon. Big is not very well but wants to and that's so ok with me 🙂 I hope your day is going well.

Hi @Maggie and @Faith-and-Hope too 🙂 And @Phoenix_Rising - I hope the weather is ok today. I'm totally there with you though so really I should know.

I need a bit of a bury it thread (that's not here) to post a message that might not make sense to many but I'm hoping @Teej is around (no rush at all) to catch it. Any ideas? 🙂

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Will chat another time
@Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear and all.

I'm sooooo tired

💜💟💗🌹🌼🌹🌼🌹🌼🌹🌼🌹🌼🌹🌼🌹

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hi all nesters. Definanother nest day for me. Still in bed with my sick dog. I hope everyone is ok. I haven't read much yet today.

Hugs to whoever wants one. 💜🤗

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I hope your dog is ok @Teej?!

I made a booking today and wanted to tell you (you popped into my mind almost as soon as I clicked to secure the date). It's left me feeling very mixed feelings, like I'm kind of excited about it now in a really odd way. I feel almost bad that I am excited but I think that's ok. It's like I have added something positive that I didn't expect would be there, to a time that in my mind I've seen only as total doom and gloom for ages (like 'my brain is so freaking annoying sometimes' kind of aaaaaaages). By positive, this is going to be a couple of hours of pretty intense pain so positive is perhaps the wrong word lol. It's not big but it's intricate and somewhere notoriously painful. I was sort of itching to tell someone because I'm keeping this one to myself beyond here (my MH worker knows). Strange, confusing, but ok and a large part of that is because I've seen it be ok for others like you. Thanks for listening. It seriously helps just to be able to share (and there's no need at all to reply to this) 💗

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