Downwards bipolar crash

Hi @Ayesha, how are you travelling now? Have been thinking of you since last we spoke on this rollercoaster today. It seems good to me the way you are observing what is happening and noting it down here from time to time, taking a step back from the swings of mood and energy. Here for a while longer if you'd like to chat.

Good morning, @Ayesha. Just saying hi and letting you know I am still thinking of you in this lead up to your hospital stay. Hoping you were able to get some sleep overnight.

@Ayesha,

You are doing good not snapping, that's hard to keep a lid on when in this kind of state. But as you would already know most likely, it tends to just make us feel worse (and anyone around at the time). I've had huge anger too at times and have let go only to regret it later, both for the further mood swinging it's seemed to cause me and for the pain I've inflicted. Do you have some specific things to do to help you get through this day? Everything ready for hospital? What time do you get admitted tomorrow? Getting to the final countdown now, not long to go.

I'll be around if you want to keep checking in over the day. Just tag me like this: @Mazarita and then I'll be sure to see your post.

@Ayesha, hugs for what you are feeling in that mixed state. Great that you've got most things ready to go. Sounds like a good plan with the kids. I'm crossing fingers for you that it's Tuesday admission. Have you been to hospital before? I have been in and out of the flat today and was out for the past few hours so sorry I couldn't respond sooner. I will get to any messages from you as soon as I can though.

@Mazarita yeah I have been to hospital for psych admissions many many times but its been a awhile since my last admission which I was pretty chuffed about..... not anymore.....

@Ayesha, sorry your good run of non-admission will be broken by this mixed episode. But it sounds like the best thing you can do is go there, from what you've written. And it sounds like you want to go and see it as a bit of a haven away from having to hold it all together at the moment. Really hope it helps a lot and that you are in a much more peaceful state when you come out and home to the kids.

@Mazarita I think one of the things im 'looking forward to' (for a REAL want of a better word) is that someone else is going to take over.....i wont have to worry about meds and if ive taken them or not. My meds are receiving a major overhaul and im a bit anxious about that....

Im also relieved i wont be at risk at making a fool of myself......at work etc..... professional integrity and all...... ive been doingf silly things as it is.

My psychiatrist refers to this visit as "taking me out the system" ...i take that as before I crash the system....too true....