Son (22) with schizophrenia

Hello @Grasshopper3 and others reading

I go into hospital 26/3 for major surgery..

I see gp tomorrow for refer ct scan of possible muscle and nerve damage in other areacheck .results to be forwarded to neurosurgeon pending more surgery...

so am trying to give self more care..

psychotherapist has increased my appointments and very supportive...

your son is so very brave and able to express what he is happy with and what not..

I imagine hearing that new psyche only there for 6 months would have been disappointing and also affect trust..

despite this he has listened..open to try medication for anxiety..anxiety does play havoc with sleep...long term insomnia takes a while to break..hence working on trying to reset body clock..

understand your son's reaction also..

I find him incredibly brave and am not just saying this because of our friendship..

with everything that he is facing he is still meeting new challenges..

you are and have been by his side...you are his life grasshopper...you are doing so well with so much to contend with..

you might not feel like it..but you have great strength and are a role model for him..he is showing great strength also..

I hope that you can have some out time soon for yourself before your overseas trip..possibly when visiting daughter?

Going to work is not time for you...

being all consumed in our son's health has it's toll on our health when we stand so strongly for them...I know..

I check a couple of threads every now and again..

When are you going overseas?

mohill

💜 @Former-Member .....

@Former-Member

Thank you for your support, and nice words, lovely to hear from you again. I didn't realise you still waiting for your surgery, but it sounds you're being looked after. All these appointments and socializing with people is just what you may need, to take your mind of things. Stay cool, everything's gonna be alright!

My son took the anxiety tablet at 6pm for the first time yesterday, and fell asleep on the coach at 7pm. He has since replaced the coach for his bed and is still snoring peacefully, so far for nearly 12 hours and still going! I hope this will help him reset his body clock.

I'll wake him up if he's still in bed at 10AM. He so needed it! He looked like a ghost yesterday, poor love. I am so proud of him going thru all of this.

My daughter lives in QLD and we are flying over in 10 days for two weeks! Then we come back for 2 weeks. Seeing psych again and due for another depot.

Then four weeks overseas. My mum is waiting patiently, lucky she hasn't had any recent falls. My dad too, he can take a break when I'm there. They have a carer come in to help mum out of bed in morning and shower her. For the rest they are on their own, and dad does everything. (80)

He said the other day I made a big mistake moving away this far. He needs me now more then ever, and that hurts. I was so young when I migrated and I knew the distance was going to be playing a big roll at a later stage. I promised them when they were too frail to come to Oz, I would fly over every year.

I have gone back ever year for the last 10 years and previously went back often too on regular basis. No wonder I have to work till I'm 88! 🙂 You just never know what life's got in store for you, do you! Now I have to consider my son as well, he needs his routine too. Everything is so unsure. We may even need to extend our stay... We are taking extra meds for my son, just in case, so we can extend with another 4 weeks if needed. I am dreading saying goodbye when we go back, it's really heart breaking.

Sorry @Former-Member, made it all about me again, I am thinking of you and hope you're without too much discomfort. It's all about you now!

Lots of love,

Grasshopper3

hello @Grasshopper3

my goodness one anti anxiety pill and he finally sleeps for hours....thank goodness...

yes waking him up before 9am every morning will help with the body clock...of course once you get overseas that goes upside down and plays havoc...

I struggled with the over the equator time difference...by body knew that I was giving it different medication at different times...so perhaps you could let your son be aware of this also once over there should his sleeping pattern worsen again...it will be temporarily until he returns to this side of the equator and once back and settled if rising at same time every day his body clock will work itself out eventually..

visting your daughter for 2 weeks might be just what you both need...a loving family member welcoming you both...also being around more well people whom your son can trust of course is very reassuring for him...he will also be wanting to see his grandparents as he realises also how much they mean to you and vice versa..

having an open plan with an option of staying longer if needed is also reassuring...

I do remember you telling us that you were returning overseas soon to see your parents for the last time..hence I mentioned time out for you...which of course is very probable given that you are staying with daughter for 2 weeks..

Saying goodbye will be extremely hard...have you discussed this with your gp or counsellor?

planning something for you all to do together might help within the realms of your parent's capabilities of course...

you have been true to your word and visited them annually...they cannot ask for more than that...you are a loving daughter as well as mother..

it does not have to be all about me either....sharing friendship and support is rewarding also

much love to you both also xxx mohill

Hello @Libra , come and meet my friend @Grasshopper3 who has a son around the age of your son

wow! reading your post sounded just like my life. My son is 29 and I've experienced very similar thngs. He was diagnosed last year, but looking back I can see that it may have started earlier.

I have a partner, but my sons illness has put a lot of stress on out relationship. My son doesn't live with us, he lives in a share house, which he hates, and wants to come home, which also breaks my heart...we have a current AVO at the moment, he has been violent when home with us.

He has just been discharged from hospital 3 days ago after spending almost 2 months there, he has just started on depot injections and Im praying that this will help with the delusions and voices..."they" have been telling him to move cities, that he must "log on" to get his money, apparently tens of thousands of dollars, somedays millions, and when I say I don't understand all that, he tells me to stop lieing, that I know all about it. It's SO SO hard. You go to bed at night worrying about the life they are going to have for the future, and the first thing that pops in your head in the morning...let alone all day.

Im going to counselling and trying to get all the support I can, but my son refuses to talk to anyone, psychiatrists, counsellors, doctors, case managers, anyone...I think if he talks it will give "them" more power.

His father passed away in 2004, liver failure, but my son thinks he was murdered, and that I know all about it...like you, this illness is something I NEVER dreamed of having to deal with when I had my beautiful 3 children, let alone have my son have to suffer with it.

Well, thanks for letting me write this down, and thanks for listening. Any advice/ support would be gratefully received.

Hello @Libra

@eudemonism expresses himself very well....He has been a light for me....enabling me to hear first hand how the illness has such an effect on day to day living...

my son has a different diagnosis...paranoid schizophrenia... he has just been detained again in another state....his diagnosis was only 17 months ago even though he was detained 4 - 5 years ago...he like your son does not trust doctors..psychiatrists...government...almost anyone in authority...they are all planning and have others working for them...even infiltrated his family ....to bring him down...as well as myself his mother....

since being detained this time he is now questioning myself and his dad(we divorced many years ago)..

there were episodes of violence..certainly aggression and paranoia was so very evident...trying to get the mental health triage to come over such a long period...you have to convince them that he is at risk of harming himself or others...those words...

I sincerely hope for him and yourself that he continues with his medication to get him through this worst part...

in years to come looking at alternatives might be an option dependent on their behaviour ...mind set..

you are considered a carer in the eyes of Carers Mental Health Australia....it took me ages to get my head around this...I did not see how if he did not live with me....they will reassure you..

they can give you some free sessions with a psychologist....take them...go to the sessions and just regurgitate every feeling thought that you have...vital to get this stuff out...

they also can direct you to groups within their sphere or outside in the community...you can meet like minded sufferers caring and feeling helpless...

there are other posts on here written by family members which are heartbreaking like yours...like mine...

it does help to know that you are not alone....

keep on writing

Good afternoon @Former-Member, @Grasshopper3, @Libra, @eudemonism, @Former-Member

Have been thinking of you all today , sending you all hugs

it does help to know that you are not alone....

keep on writing