Frank Discussion of BPD: *WARNING* May be confronting

Yeah, I know right. BP traits (BPD as in borderline). I get sad. I get scared. I react sometimes. I can have difficulty controlling my emotions. I have a fairly intense desire to not feel the increible pain that has come from signficant loss and sometimes this can manifest as SI. All these words to me mean that I am human and I have feelings and I have been hurt. That's all.

For me @Former-Member.. it was my partner's BPD diagnosis... or rather I believe mis-diagnosis. That is what made me start researching how it was diagnosed and then I discovered there is an argument even inside they psychology/psychiatrist faculty itself about BPD diagnosing and a push for the paramaters to be tightened and more clearly defined.

@Former-Member - if this is a safe place for you then I am super happy you are here joining this with us

@Former-Member No you should definitely be jumping in.. please do jump in. would love your views and experiences. Please.

I don't have an issue with labels but these ones seem to be used against us. Just my opinion.

see @Former-Member there's that BPD Traits ... sooo annoying! Does it annoy you or do you find it helpful?

What do you think your would be a better fit for your partner @Former-Member (if you don't mind me asking)

I'll do my likes later.. because it takes me 5 mins to do a darn like!

@Former-Member see ... now that's crazy... I mean that colloquial usage... I mean.. when under stress who doesn't react like that? Doesn't mean you have BPD necessarily.. mean you have emotions like a human being is supposed to have. That's the part that irritates me about BP Traits. What are we supposed to be robots now? Is that why we get meds to have chemical labotomies?

BUT people who really have BPD need help, they need to be able to learn how to control their emotions swings because those are dominating their lives. That's a different issue than reacting because of a genuinely frustrating situation or cicumstance or a triggered stressful situation.

I hate the label. I understand the issues for me relating to it. No emotion regulation, complete fear of abandonment, impulsiveness (not so much now) SH and SI, inability to deal with anger (for me it gets turned inward), no sense of identity, emotional detachment. I get my DPD stuff which much of it overlaps. But the labels mean you don't get treated as a person anymore just a diagnosis.

My partner was originally diagnosed with bipolar. I guess it's the more "common" and "accepted" condition. What is a diagnosis anyway? Unless a doctor is observing a client over a lengthy period of time, a diagnosis is just made based on what is said, how a series of questions are answered and perhaps a couple of interactions.

Whilst I have no psych qualifications whatsoever, after extensive research and living experience, I have come to realise that he fits the description of BPD down to a tee. It's as if they were describing every facet of his being. The only thing that he doesn't exhibit is acting on suicidal thoughts. His religion dictates that suicide is the absolutely worst thing you could ever do, more so than murder so whilst he hates life he had never attempted suicide.

What I couldn't cope with was his violent nature which would come out of nowhere. It wasn't as if we argued and there was a gradual build up. It would occur when I'd least expect it and once it started it was like a bomb going off. There was absolutely nothing I could do to calm him down.