Riding a wave

Hi @Phoenix_Rising

I read your post with a really heavy heart. I can hear how totally 'muddled' you are feeling and I understand why. I have no helping things to say. I'm here climbing down into the hole with you. 🐢

@Zoe7 I'm open to any time. I've decided I will have all-you-can-eat dinner instead of all-you-can-eat lunch so I will leave home around 5pm (AEST). I'm happy for you to pick a time with that in mind.

Thank you for stopping by @Former-Member. It is so crushing, knowing that this stuff IS fixable...if only I (and I'm guessing you too) could find the right support. Did you read about my latest adventure of the psychiatrist refusing to see me because I'm "too complex"? I know I'm totally lost now. "Fred" always told me I was too f***ed up for anyone else to treat and he was right. No matter how you look at it, he was right. It is two years and eleven mental health professionals since the final very public show-down between us. I haven't been able to find anyone to help me. I know (A) is trying, but I know she doesn't really get the trauma stuff. I feel super super super hopeless. If only ONLY I could have kept working with the uni counsellor, I would probably be out of my muddle by now. Instead, I am sinking ever-deeper into depression and consequenty moving towards suicide.

I did read @Phoenix_Rising about the psychiatrist and was totally amazed and still scratching my head as to why someone would chose 'too complex' over the opportunity to help someone and be professionally challenged in the process. I know it is all messed up but sometimes we don't know what comes next either. Thinking of you 💐🐢 ( I'm hoping sending flowers is ok to say I'm thinking of you )

@Former-Member Flowers are super nice.

How about we do 12 midday for a starting time - then we can cover lunchtimes for those who work but would like to come along for a little while also - and 5 hours of partying (as I found out yesterday) can be a very long day

I will tag in everyone (that I can remember) as I did for Shaz and F&H bday unless you would only prefer for a few to be tagged in @Phoenix_Rising

@Zoe7 Mid-day AEST sounds like a super party starting time.

@Former-Member I saw you floating around the forums. I am super glad to see you back here - I super missed you. May I please have a tinsy tiny turtle hug? I have been super struggling over the past few days, but now I'm about to head out to see (A) and we are having a party for my birthday. I'm super hoping that this will lift my mood. Also, I saw my GP this morning and I am going to start on a new anti-depressant, which I'm super hoping will help to de-puddle my puddled brain. It is kind-of a super challenge because I have been on this medication before and I had to stop it after a few days because it super giantly increased the suicidal ideation. However, this time around I am aware of this risk and I am hopeful that just knowing about it will help to ameliorate it. And if that DOES happen, the plan is that I will take some only-in-emergencies medication, and if that doesn't solve the issue, I will simply stop taking the anti-depressant. Yep, I feel totally in control of this adventure, and hopefully the anti-depressant is going to super help me to start on an upward spiral. Yay for a GP who is committed to working with me even though the psychiatrist has written me off as "too complex" without even meeting me.

I've got this. Yay for me.

Yea for little turtle @Phoenix_Rising - you certainly seem to be on top of this - WTG

Midday party (AEST) it is then - can't wait for this one - super excited!!!!!

Needed a day off after the epic party on Sunday but back into it and full steam ahead for yours now. Invitations will go out tonight - the venue is organised and I know CB and Rockpool are pretty much organised from their end - another EPIC party coming up - and it is all for you @Phoenix_Rising

Have a great party today with A - I hope it will lift your mood - and I want to hear all about it later!

Zoe

Hello @Phoenix_Rising !!

Yes I am back, just in time for a super fun party for someone super special!

I missed forumland and you all, one tiny turtle hug for you coming right up 🙂

That sounds really good that you are going to try using the antidepressant in emergencies, great idea, it seems like you have some ideas if you find it doesn't work out well and stopping the medication if you need, I hope so much it helps!

YAY for you!