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Depressed with my situation, later 50s

mrmistaSenior Contributor04 Apr 2026, 7:43 pm AEDT

Depressed with my situation, later 50s

Hi there people thx for having me. 1st post so l this is an ok place for depression as l couldn't find a depression section.

lt seems to me crazy especially at this stage but l'm just so damn stuck about my situation and just can not seem to be able to come up with a decision on what to do with it.

l didn't do well getting rid of my house but l did still also have a block of land in a small town. My ex and l bought it yrs back it was just suppose to be an investment but now because of the way things went with my house, it's looking like the best solution from here would be to just build something on the block. There's no debt on the block at all now and l do have small savings left that l could build a simple house with so financially it'd be ideal as l'd have no debt or mortgage.

Problem is a few things.

1stly, although l moved to regional area awhile back now, l grew up in the city but the town here at the block is tiny, no shops just a pub. Nearest decent town is 45k away.

The block does have a small cabin on it and l;ve been staying 6mths now supposedly figuring out whether l wanna build on it of not.

lt is a pretty block and spot and l'd have no debt if l just stayed here, where as not only don't l feel up to moving any more but l can't afford to now or to take on a new mortgage either after the house loss but somewhere better would be much much dearer and there'd be no way without one.

Trouble is, the town depresses the hell out of me especially at night every night l just sink again even if the day hasn't been too bad, sometimes even quite nice. Night comes round and down l go.

lt's just so damn small and away and at night there's just nothing except house lights on, that's it.

l mean if l had a choice l wouldn't choice to settle here never bought it back when for that at all, it's just the best solution though all round for sure. All round except that l just get so damn depressed out here.

So 6mths and l'm still absolutely nowhere about building something so l'm still just in the little cabin. Trouble with just doing it is, that if this went on and l just hated it here, l might not even be able to sell it and get my money back anyway and it still leaves the same problems above, with going somewhere better anyway.

lt's mad but l don't think l've ever been so stuck in my life.

Best to all.

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In response to: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

GlistenSenior Contributor18 Apr 2026, 11:22 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

Oh my stars! @tyme said:

“LOL. Mu mother doesn't even know my birthday. One year, in a group chat, my sister said Happy Birthday to me. My mum asked, "Whose birthday is it?"

Are you permanently scared from that?
Really. It was your mom, Chick. Like was it a sign that a stroke was imminent?

Birthdays in my family are significant because it’s like a little bit of history repeating.

For example my mom was giving birth to me on the hour the her brother was getting married. Which was also my great grandmother’s birthday.

My granddaughter missed being born on that date by 12 hours. My first words to her were, “You’re late.”

My three children, have their birthdays within three weeks of each other.

And dates are a thing because we all have ADHD or AuDHD 😆

@mrmista @TAB @Pilih

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

TABSenior Contributor18 Apr 2026, 11:25 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

my departed mother could say time, length of labor etc at drop of had 20plus years later @Glisten

In response to: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

GlistenSenior Contributor18 Apr 2026, 11:25 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

Go with your good health self @TAB Tabby

We will cheer you on.

@tyme @mrmista @Pilih

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

GlistenSenior Contributor18 Apr 2026, 11:34 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

Oh hell no @TAB with all due respect to your dear mother.

My family and extended family focuses on positive things. We are very happiness driven.

Nothing about hours in labour has fun stamped on it. lol 😝

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

TABSenior Contributor18 Apr 2026, 11:38 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

this was extraneous info 'delivered' upon request of other participant ie me @Glisten

was about to say do you have kids,ok rally peeps probs grandkids as well lolo...............

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

Shaz51Senior Contributor19 Apr 2026, 2:04 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

Hello @Pilih , @tyme , @Glisten , @mrmista , @TAB , @Honeymoon

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

GlistenSenior Contributor19 Apr 2026, 2:23 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

@Shaz51 PAHAHA love your meme Shazzy.

I just spent $1,500 purchased a reconditioned iPad + Pencil that I really needed for drafting design landscaping and building furniture.

But it still makes me feel nauseous :nauseated_face: spending the money.

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

mrmistaSenior Contributor19 Apr 2026, 3:04 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

@Shaz51

That is one beautiful looking coffee shaz.

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

mrmistaSenior Contributor19 Apr 2026, 7:38 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

@Pilih @TAB @Glisten @Shaz51 @tyme .

In no particular order- amazed l managed all those actually.🤣

Well, anywayyyy.

Yesterday spoke to someone, kind of a life counsellor come shrink butttt, in his old life he use to be a property developer.

He's been helping me through some other stuff haven't talked about here, also helped a friend of mine hugely a few yrs back, that's how l heard of him.

Things is, l'm really struggling with staying here, building, making it permanent , l just don't bloody like it and the depressions been bloody terrible too.

The 55k drive ea way up to town is really taxing to after a few 100trips, hate to think in a few yrs time.

Well, l've also started the build, "twice now " but backed out again ea time. Because of all the above.

He reckons, 5mths there, absolutely no change , strike 1.

Depressed the whole bloody time because of the area and tiny town, strike 2.

Backed out of building - " twice " , strike 3.

The distances from anything and any services at all, all that driving, is only gonna get worse. Strike 4.

He said your not struggling so much with it because your indecisive or some other rubbish.

Your struggling because that is 4 very big very real strikes against staying and your gut and the depression is screaming it at you.

Your not indecisive , your hearing your gut.

There's only one problem, l know it, he's right.

But what the hell else do l do.

In response to: Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

tymeModerator19 Apr 2026, 8:01 pm AEST

Re: Depressed with my situation, later 50s

Hey matey @mrmista ,

Glad to see you.

Yes, depression sucks at the best of times. Such a downer.

At the same time, well done of getting stuff done! That's a huge accomplishment in itself!

We can dream big, but remember, take one step at a time, or you might find yourself slipping back.

I hear distance is stressful. Do you access support through telehealth? Or have you tried SANE's Recovery Club? https://www.sane.org/recovery-club

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