Does it ever stop

@Bow @Snowie @AlwaysMyself @Appleblossom @Anonymouse1000 @Jynx @tyme @Jacques @Shaz51 - feels like I’m dragging myself along today all my emotions are hitting at once and all I wanna do is hide and not come out at all because I’m so overwhelmed.

im trying to block out the negative people but they still somehow still find a way to talk to me and it really upsets me because every time I feel like I escape from them they find a way back to me. I feel like it’s just not fair.

im also stressed about being discharged from the community MH team because they have became apart of my care team and now they are leaving because they feel like they have nothing else to help with, or they can’t do anything else and I don’t seem to be making any progress in there view which really upsets me because I feel like I try and make progress but it’s so hard because I’ve had so much happen in the past year I’m like give me a break.

but I am safe and I’ll keep pushing on.

Hi @Fluttershy1

It sounds like you are going through a lot, I know that the MH care teams are a great resource.

I haven’t used them as much because I don't feel like I am in crisis just yet.

Although I feel like I dive into work because it distracts me from actually healing and getting better.

Hey @Anonymouse1000 - it has been hectic and still is, I just wanna cry and hide, it feels like an effort today because everything just keeps going the wrong way.

but also don’t forget to help yourself because it’s not gunna help if you continually distract yourself it will only help for a short time.

am safe

@Fluttershy1 - I hope it all gets better for you. I know that we all have good days and bad days. The forum here is good for when we have bad and good days...

Lets hope for more good days soon!

oh the journey of integration... our soul path...

I am not sure I would have made it without support.

Hearing your struggle, but also your strength @Fluttershy1 you are right, they are making it harder to get NDIS.

@Anonymouse1000 glad you are not in crisis, but its important to get help when we need it.

I also find work a helpful distraction. Its good for meaning, and can have good ripple effects, but .. somehow we have to process our emotions.

Hello @AlwaysMyself @Snowie @Bow

That sounds like big change to be being discharged from the community MH team care @Fluttershy1 . Do they help by ensuring you are transitioned to someone else to provide the ongoing care in an affordable and accessible manner?

I have often heard of people being discharged from community MH teams before they are "stable" and/or able to access another free support service. Unfortunately the public health system generally doesn't seem to be setup for chronic or complex illnesses, and are instead setup for short-term crisis (e.g. 8 week programs).

A personal experience myself, as a way of saying "I hear you" and that it isn't "personal" to you (i.e. you have NOT done anything wrong) - it's the system funding & demand for services usually. Please do not feel you need to read it if it would be at all a triggering topic for you. (Although I do suspect @Appleblossom may find it interesting?)

TW: Suicidal thoughts

---

@Fluttershy1 wrote:

I don’t seem to be making any progress in there view which really upsets me because I feel like I try and make progress but it’s so hard because I’ve had so much happen in the past year I’m like give me a break.

---

It's not your fault. I know it can be hard to not feel like it is and wonder what you are doing wrong, etc. (Or at least - for me I always asked these questions!). I have had mental illness for nearly 25 years. I have never "improved" from extensive and intensive MH treatments -- I have only learned to control my behaviours and rationalise. But you know what? It's not my fault. I have "done everything right" - to the frustration of myself, my family and my doctors because it hasn't helped. Of course I am a very atypical case! Most people do not have an experience like mine, most people do recover, but it can take time and its OK if it takes a bit longer than it might take the (statistically) "typical" person.

Actually, I think its "normal" to take longer when there are more complex factors at play! Like intellectual disability, ptsd, BPD, etc etc.

@Anonymouse1000 - I just wanna hide, today was a lot, am safe though.

Hey @Appleblossom - hope your day has been well.

Hey @AlwaysMyself - I’ve just been referred back to my NDIS team which isn’t really much, I don’t have a Threapist or behaviour support at the moment as they are fired because they scammed me.

i feel like everything is my fault, i feel like they have just put me in the to hard basket and just left me there to try and manage on my own.

i am safe but broken inside. Everything feels like it’s falling apart all over again.

there’s tension in the house and I just wanna cry because no one is getting along and it’s just triggering me and I hate it. It’s not fair.

I feel like there’s a lot of stigma around BPD etc and that they don’t understand it and they just seem to push us away. Even when we are at our worst.

Hey @AlwaysMyself @Appleblossom @Anonymouse1000 @Snowie @Bow @Shaz51 @Jynx @rav3n - today has been extremely tough, been through all the emotions and cried, it’s been a really long day I just want the day to be done with as it’s overwhelming, my support worker got to me and I just bawled my eyes out in her arms and she just held me till I calmed down.

im so stressed it isn’t funny, but I have the best support workers that help me through. It’s not easy.