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Guilty for being sexualy harassed

SneaklightContributor18 Jan 2026, 12:12 am AEDT

Guilty for being sexualy harassed

I had a freind who would send through hentai all the time (never asked him to) real disgusting vivid shit i didint Wana see i told him to stop multiple times he never did

I'd ask one of my others friends to tell him to stop and he would when they got involved but shortly after he would go back to sending me hentai

I asked him to stop so many times but eventually I just played along and practically ignored it and never told anyone (not even my parents) cause well he wasnt gonna stop and he was one of my few friends like I couldn't loose one of my only buds

And now realising what he did was a form of harassment I feel disgusted and my brain is finding every excuse it can to call me the disgusting one even tho I asked him to stop and I was the victim

And when my brain does this I get all shaky and scared and all illogical and idk how to stop this

2 replies

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In response to: Guilty for being sexualy harassed

mallory_strifeSenior Contributor18 Jan 2026, 12:20 am AEDT

Re: Guilty for being sexualy harassed

hi. i wrote a reply here and then i hit an error and it's gone. but briefly i relate to letting people walk all over you because they were your only company and the somatic symptoms you describe. sometimes it feels like the only emotions i have anymore are shaky and scared and illogical. i may try and write a full reply later

In response to: Guilty for being sexualy harassed

NightHedgehogModerator18 Jan 2026, 9:37 am AEDT

Re: Guilty for being sexualy harassed

You are right @Sneaklight what happened was harassment and definitely was not ok for this person to be doing this. You are also not alone in feeling like this! Its normal for our brains to try and make sense of something that is so violating and distressing, but unfortunately our minds don't always land on the truth, or they can end up being mean to us. It sounds like you did really well to try and get this person to stop and to ask other people to help you with this, especially when you were already concerned about losing friends.

It sounds like this is someone you are not in contact with anymore, but just in case you are or they get back in contact - there is some information on the esafety page here about things you can do with unwanted contact or contact that makes you feel unsafe. It sounds like it might also be a good idea to talk to a support person (psych, social worker, helpline etc) about the impact this had on you - you deserve to be supported!

You mentioned that sometimes when this comes up your brain becomes shaky, scared and illogical. Hopefully talking to a support person can help with this too! But in the meantime I can add some stuff below that might be helpful when your brain is feeling like this (the progressive muscle relaxation one is aimed at kids but this is mostly because I get annoyed with the breathy voices of the people that do the ones aimed at adults but you can youtube others that you like better!).

TIP Skills: Reduce Extreme Emotions Quickly | DBT-RU
Progressive Muscle Relaxation for Kids
Grounding Techniques: Exercises for Anxiety, PTSD, and More

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