@Bunniekins I am not a fan of blocking for the same reason as I don't like when a person has been "paused" and we're not told the reason why.
About 18 months ago I was friends with a former member who was paused for quite a while and not being able to know why or for how long I worried about this person and whether they were okay. This is, after all a forum for mental health, and when someone goes quiet it can be quite stressful. The same as being blocked. I have suffered from a spirit (or fear) of rejection most of my adult life and until as recently as a couple of months ago even having someone on Facebook block me caused me to spiral and it lead to some irrational behaviour that I am not proud of.
It also lends itself to bullying - ie I don't like or agree with what that person is saying therefore they must be blocked from a thread.
I also think that the forums are far too concerned about hurting peoples' feelings. I understand that talking in depth about personal things need to come with warnings and can bring up bad memories for some people but having to have a trigger warning because @PeppyPatti and I mentioned someone with an island and who was a not very nice person, to me is a little over the top. We are all in the real world and we read news online or watch it on TV so we're going to hear about it. People don't live on the forums.
We embrace gender fluidity and pronouns but I am not allowed to speak of my faith unless it's in a specific chat. As most people now probably realise I am a conservative Christian and I don't go along with a lot of what we are supposed to accept as the norm so that might be construed as triggering to me.
Politics - we can discuss certain political figures in a negative light but others are edited - I am speaking from experience here. I have mentioned more than once I would prefer not to have to read anything about any politician to keep it safe yet I am still seeing disparaging remarks. I don't expect you to like the politician but let's respect their position.
Moderators need to be consistent. I have been threatened by a certain moderator yet others who I have the utmost respect for are kind and empathetic. I put in a complaint about this moderator and have yet to hear back, which makes me even more upset as I feel like I have to walk on eggshells because I have no idea whether that same moderator is going to rip into me or I'm going to have one of the more empathetic mods.
I use moderator as any member who is authorised to modify posts.
The comment about being able to contact members outside of the forum is a touchy one for me. Without going into detail why, I would be concerned that should a friendship form and this person has your contact email or phone number they could become a burden, relying on your attention constantly. @tyme and I had this conversation a while back, am happy to email you in confidence if you want to know more Tymey xo.
I have been a victim of stalking, first by an ex colleague and then by my ex friend. It has taken nearly 3 years to overcome the damage that ex friend caused with her clinginess and then dropping me like a hot stone.
Sane also needs to make sure they are not liable for any damages caused by such an interaction. Unless there was a disclaimer absolving Sane of any negative outcome I don't see being able to contact others outside of the forum possible.
I get frustrated that I can't speak freely and to be able to say what I truly want to would be great, but sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for.
Thanks for this thread Bun Bun and thanks @Jynx for referring me. I adore y'all (you too Tymey!)
