Eliminating or reducing chronic (everyday) flashbacks

@AuntGlow I have mentioned it in therapy, it’s a tricky one.

I haven’t studied naturopathy, I do believe herbs can be used in healing when done safely. I’ve come across a place that does personal training and helps with nutrition, I’m still waiting for them to send more information about it. I’ll have to determine whether it’s financially feasible. I need help with strengthening my muscle, but they provide some nutrition information in conjunction to exercise regimes. I’m guessing I’ll need to adjust my food intake if I start exercising more. My mum doesn’t think I’m very good with food, I just don’t get hungry. Maybe I have a bit of disordered eating. I’ve had MH professional ask me straight up about whether I’m restrictive after they look at my physical appearance (I know they ask because they care but I find it frustrating). I wouldn’t say I’m super restrictive, but I’m a bit OCD. My brain obsesses over eating proper portion sizes and healthy eating. What I know is, I don’t have a healthy relationship with food even if I don’t have a ED. I think it’s a trauma response, I start controlling aspects of my life that I have control over. You can control your diet.

I find binaural and alpha wave music soothing. Delta waves are also good before bed. I also listen to other music, like alternative, rock, indie

It feels hard to cope, maybe I need another PRN, the urges are here. I’m safe for now. I need the flashbacks to stop

@Jynx maybe I just need company. Not sure what else can be done, there is no switch to turn this discomfort off. I wish there was.

I feel a bit guilty for feeling this way, maybe it’s just my brain overthinking myself to the point of guilt. Maybe it’s just been a rough day, I feel very tired, sleepy and achy. My eye also feels gross and sticky, one of the reasons why I don’t want to cry because I don’t want to cry pus. I also have family around. Don’t know if it’s a coincidence, sinus infection hasn’t helped my eye. I am getting the eye thing sorted on Wednesday, so hopefully it’ll be fixed afterwards and not reoccur like it has in the past. Though I could probably use a good cry, just don’t feel like I can rn.

I know urges won’t help me sleep tonight, I’ll try to resist and take PRN instead. PRN will help me resist

I’ve had PRN and I am still snappy, I don’t know if I have to wait for it to calm me

Having lots of vivid images, trying to not get carried away, but it’s hard @tyme. Creativity can be a blessing, but when it comes to SI it is frustrating. They’re just thoughts trying to convince me I’m better off gone, I know their thoughts and thoughts aren’t always accurate. It is an inner battle. I’m safe

I can imagine it would be... what did your therapist say? @creative_writer

Ah, I understand this thought process very well. I think it's very common for food to be an obsession with OCD, because like you said, it feels more controllable - which can create a sense of certainty and safety for the brain. I think it's wonderful that you're looking into all the different ways you can support your body and mind. I think you will be able to do this in a healthier way in time. You're doing all the right things for yourself by reaching out and being honest with where you're at. This will shift. 💛

Oh yes! I am sure the binaural and different wave states are super helpful. Have you explored EFT 'tapping' before bed as well?