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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

There's something very spiritual about watching the flames dance @Jynx

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Mmmm agreeeeee @NightFury I think fire is amazing. And an excellent way to ritualistically burn certain journal pages 😉

Hehe I shall have to say goodnight methinks! I hope that you are able to get a restful night hun, and that tomorrow is a little easier 🤞

Hugs!

⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I have done something similar before @Jynx burnt letters, I wrote to people who hurt me.

Good night. Thanks for keeping me company tonight.

In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Good evening @NightFury! 🥰

Yes, having someone to talk to can shift so much for us, can't it? I'm proud of you for opening up to her.

Oh wow, how did it feel to share in the group? 😍

This is so good to know! I know it's scary, but it kind of seems like your whole world could open up a bit here? What if not getting this role really was redirection/protection from something/someone bigger?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @AuntGlow hope you're well?

I shared in the chat during the group sessio and it felt good. Maybe one day I'll be confident enough to actually use my voice and talk out loud.

I just had my first session with the EAP counsellor and we talked about something similar - about how teaching might not align with me any more. I just need to sit with that for a bit...

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I am well, thank you for checking @NightFury 💛

Honestly, it takes time! I think slowly easing yourself into sharing is a really great way to build your capacity without flooding your nervous system before it's ready.

It's okay to sit with it, I am sure it's a lot to process... we will be here to talk it all out with you as things come up. 🥰

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I'm glad you're well @AuntGlow

For me, things have been weird today.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hmm, what's felt most weird today? @NightFury 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

In spite of taking my sleep meds, I only got a couple of hours sleep last night, well, early this morning @AuntGlow and when I woke up, I felt really out of it. I felt...like I was disconnected from reality almost...like I was in a dream. I kept telling myself that something was wrong, almost like I was trying to acknowledge it so that I could shake it - but I couldn't. It rattled me a little, because I took my meds and still struggled with my sleep and because I felt...so foggy.

The feeling faded as the day went and work became a distraction.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I am sure there is so much going on in your mind and body @NightFury. This sense of disconnection really would be overwhelming... but I am glad that it shifted throughout your day.

It sounds to me like you're really exhausted from not only not sleeping, but everything that has been going on.

How can you support yourself with even more love and care this week? And are there any boundaries you can set with work and study so you're not overloading yourself? 💛

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