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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I have heard about that @tyme

There was some talk of it in QLD before I left - that QLD schools would be trialing four day weeks. I don't believe it's happened yet. I don't know if it will happen at all.

But I guess we'll have to wait and see.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Honestly speaking, I don't think it will ever happen in state schools because a lot in state schools are vulnerable which means school is safer than home @NightFury

So it's an interesting thought.

Others, during the teacher shortage, had 1-2 days studying from home and the other days were face to face.

Anyway, I'm going to start wrapping up here because I've got a bit of admin work to do this evening.

I'll catch you next time.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I still taught and worked five days a week during COVID. @tyme we had less students and less structure in terms of classes, but we still had students.

I've seen that first hand - that school is safer then at home. It's a really hard thing to experience as a teacher, but it also makes you aware of how important it is for you to be a part of that safe environment and to be a safe person for those little people who maybe don't have it at home.

Good night tyme.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I'm popping in to say hi as I've been thinking about you @NightFury .

How's today been?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @tyme I may have missed you, but thank you for thinking of me and for popping by.

I helped my brother and his wife move house today, so it's been a physical day. I've struggled with tiredness and with things feeling pretty heavy. My Dad didn't have great news about my Grandfather today, so...

I hope you're doing okay?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

How has your weekend been? @NightFury 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hello @AuntGlow how's your weekend been?

My weekend has been a bit of a mixed bag. I woke up feeling tired and heavy yesterday, but I'd committed to helping my brother move house, so I went and did that. I got some news from my Dad about my Grandad. After helping my brother, I went on a random Kmart mission! I went to bed early and slept for 10.5 hours!

Today, I feel better...not as tired. I've had a quiet day - a morning of household jobs, and groceries, and after lunch time I've just tried to rest my brain. But...I'm dealing with

some SH urges this afternoon. So I'm sitting in front of the fire, colouring with the TV on in the background.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hiii!! @NightFury

It's been a big weekend, actually. Now my intention is to slow down haha

It sounds like you had a really busy day yesterday - how fun is K-Mart?!

What is the update with your grandad? Do you want to share at all? 💛

SO glad you slept that long, that must have felt really nice.

I am wondering if those urges are coming up more because it's a slower day for you?

How does the fire, TV, and colouring in feel?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@AuntGlow it sounds like you're listening to what you need in setting the intention to slow down.

K-Mart is fun! But a bit dangerous for the hip pocket. It's easy to just throw stuff in the trolley and spend more money than you intended.

My Grandad? After I left on Monday night, the nurses found him out cold on his bed. He came to confused and slurring his words. The nurses told my Dad that his brain had been starved of oxygen for too long which made him lose consciousness. We're not sure, but we don't think it will be long.

Sleeping felt good, but...actually, I don't want to talk about it.

That's probably why they're coming up AuntGlow. I don't often allow myself to stop like this, but when I do, I find that they're worse and more persistent.

I've put the coloring away, and my dog has taken up my spot by the fire. The TV is still on though. It didn't really work as a distraction today.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hey @NightFury ,

Just read the post above. My heart stopped a beat when I read about your grandad. That's pretty hectic.

How are you holding up?

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