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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work


@NightFury wrote:

@tyme what I'm reading...probably between the lines - is that it's worth speaking to them even if I already have doubts? And it's okay to not go through with it from my perspective as well? And if they decide not to take me on...it'll feel like rejection, but it'll be because it's not for me at this time in my journey?


I guess so @NightFury ?

In other words, if you feel okay about it in your gut after speaking to them, then go for it. If not, then tell yourself it's totally okay.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Thank you for your help @tyme

What does tomorrow look like for you?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I'm going to spend tomorrow planning out my next few weeks. My sticky notes are pretty much done bar one task which I'm waiting on someone else to give me some documents.

So tomorrow will be planning day I guess? @NightFury And I'll write some more sticky notes so my brain can be compartmentalised again?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Planning day sounds like a good day @tyme time to organise yourself and help your brain to feel organised is always worth it.

In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I get that, sometimes we need to go through a few of our strategies before one does the trick. @NightFury 💕

Hmm, yes it could go either way... but what if I told you that either way is okay? That you are allowed to clamp up and you're allowed to express it all? What if you could meet yourself where you're at and know that a counsellor is the best person to be whatever version of yourself you need to be in the moment?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

My brain is chewing on that @AuntGlow, the fact that maybe it's okay for me to go either way, that maybe a counsellor is the best person to be whatever I need to be in the moment.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I hope it helps to sit with that thought @NightFury. Let me know how your session goes, please. 🥰

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @AuntGlow have you got a minute, if you're still around?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi! Yes, go ahead! @NightFury 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

So, I've just finished the phone appointment.

Today's been a tough day mentally, and doing the phone call today was a lot. I feel so drained this evening @AuntGlow.

I'm trying to process some feelings around the phone appointment. It didn't go badly, she asked me questions about presenting problems, protective factors, safety...that kind of thing.

But...I don't think I can do it at the moment. I have soso much going on, and I don't feel like I'm in a good emotional and energetic space right now, and part of me doesn't want to take anything else on or make any big commitments. I have my psychologist appointment coming up next week - trying a new psych, and I question whether it's too much right now to add counselling on top.

But I feel like I could be letting myself down if I decide not to do the 6 counselling sessions on offer.

I'm aware that you're heading off soon, so if you can't get to this...don't worry.

@tyme

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