Lacking motivation and a want to do things

It’s good you are able to get joy on your good days @Salzburg

For two reasons 1. You get joy and 2. You know that when you’re down it’s not always going to be like that

@Till23 i have bipolar 2 with mainly depression and adhd

Yes well unfortunately @Muffin12 you’ve have two things that could lead to procrastination but not everyone with those diagnoses will procrastinate.

It’s hard isn’t when you know there’s something to do, but you just don’t get around to doing it

@Till23 it is really hard as you say.

The thing I find hard is that I see my doctors and therapists, I take all the recommended medication they prescribe and feel like I do a fair bit to get treatment/ help.

Yet it isn't treated 100%. I'm definitely better on treatment compared to not having treatment and I'm grateful for that...but i want to not have any of these symptoms...I want to be "well".

But I'm realising that might not happen despite what everyone says about mental illness being treatable.

I think some of us are left with some symptoms, despite all best efforts, and we have to deal with them every day.

I keep thinking it will get better but I think it might not..and I'm going to have to accept that.

Do others think the same?

@Muffin12 I am the same - see GP and psychologist am compliant with meds and treatments (therapy).

I try to help myself by researching, attending this forum and the webinars. I am definitely better on medication

You don't have to answer any of these questions

Approximately how old are you - I'm in my 60s I have cPTSD, depression and anxiety.

Is this your first episode of depression

@Till23 I'm in my 50's.

I've had depression since 18 years old. Changed diagnosis to bipolar 2 later in life. Plus recent diagnosis of adhd.

On medication since late 20's.

Well then you know @Muffin12 that for many people MH issues are more of a chronic disease.

And while people say that MH issues are treatable, very few people say curable

So like Type I diabetes it can be treated but it cannot be cured, those people will always rely on insulin given to them, because they cannot make their own. Although some lucky people do manage a complete remission of MH symptoms (you never know if it's permanent)

So, I suppose with MH issues, it's a matter of finding the right medication, therapy and supports especially to get through the acute stages. Of course you hope that you will have good times that last for long periods. I'm not sure if people have some residual symptoms that continue throughout like procrastination, or whether they can have some truly asymptomatic times.

I have stopped my medications a few times, the longest I ever lasted was about a year, then I realised I was getting too unwell and went back to GP to restart.

@Till23 I've been doing some research and there is definitely a group of people who can manage their symptoms with treatment but who still experience symptoms despite having the best available treatment and doing well with self care.

Part of my issue is when I start to feel unwell, I get so discouraged and disheartened at the same time I think it is even worse.

So I need to be more accepting that things are what they are and I can't always control it.

I agree it's hard when things start to "go south" @Muffin12

It is discouraging and I think I feel worse, because previously things were going fairly well.

Also I feel disheartened that I am not in control of my MH. I think because of hypervigilance, due to the childhood trauma), and being used to having some sort of control over my environment by standing/sitting in certain places in the room, not going to some things (like if there's big crowds etc) it's hard when I feel I can't even have some sort of control of my own thinking and reactions.

Trying to accept the current status is difficult I think because I would have liked something a bit different, but I know I must accept it, otherwise it will be another thing holding me back.

@Till23 thank you for responding.

It is discouraging to wake up feeling awful after having a good day or days before.

I totally agree about wanting to be in more control or have more control over how we feel. I think when we do have some control over other areas of our lives we see how helpful it can be. I then want that in regards to controlling my symptoms.

I am going to see my therapist tomorrow and want to talk more about my problem with acceptance...of my illness, reduced capacity, loss of career and unpredictability of how I am going to be like when I wake up each day.

I want to learn to keep going and try to get better but at the same time somehow accept I have this chronic illness that has no cure.