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Managing thoughts of suicide & self-harm

Battles

Battles

Hi all, does anyone else just feel like life is just one big sh!t show? It's just one thing after another, constant drama, family issues, money struggles, stress, anxiety it's just always something.

When do things get easier, do things ever change?

I've been through more than i care to think about in my life but today has pushed me to breaking point and it's bringing up alot of bad memories of previous suicide attempts.

I just feel like it's not worth it, it's not worth fighting, not worth hanging on anymore.

13216 replies

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In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@rav3n it definitely does make it more motivating. We're excited to be working on it together, it's so nice to have a close connection with her, I truly value the friendship we have 😊.

I'm going to start working on another colouring tonight 😊.

Have you got any plans for the week?

In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

I'm sorry to hear about your blood tests @MissGremlin

Medical stuff is stressful and can be scary. It sounds as if you can make some changes that can help, like with diet and stuff, which is positive. It will be hard, but you've got this and we've got you, my friend. It's also positive, that you have an in-person person that is supportive and can help to support you and go on the journey with you, that too is a positive.

Take your time to process, and to feel your feelings around this. Be gentle with yourself.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury thankyou sweet ❤️. It's definitely scary and stressful. I don't have in-person support as such, but I do have a very close friend, just unfortunately there's distance between us.

I am trying to be gentle with myself, I was working on my puzzle earlier and giving Casper cuddles. I'm now sitting on my bed with Casper and thinking about doing some colouring.

How's your evening been?

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

It sounds like you're doing a good job of self-care @MissGremlin by doing things you enjoy and things you find soothing.

My evening is kind of up and down...

I had a moment earlier where I couldn't remember where I put my keys and I kind of panicked because my brain jumped to the concluaion that someone had come in and taken them again.

Following that, I had a moment of...."I can't do this..." but I was just... over whelmed, I think.

I applied for a job. Not really thinking I'll get it, but as a youth well being and support officer at an independent school here.

And, now I'm trying to relax and switch off a little by drinking a cup of tea and watching TV.

In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin Hey just responding to post i still to read rest of page just quickly want to say no one can say anyth one course of action taken through life caused pre diabetic results, going down the what if path of thought is a destructive default i share also.

knowing its not an ideal result please dont make it harder on youself by entertaining thoughts of it being your fault.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury oh I can understand the panic from not remembering where you put your keys, it would have been a scary moment.

Those moments of 'I can't do this', I get them all the time, it's frustrating but yes it's usually in a moment of feeling overwhelmed.

Well done for applying for the job, fingers crossed you get it sweet.

Relaxing with a cup of tea and watching TV sounds perfect ❤️

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin thank you for tagging me into thread,you have been on my mind since thus morning and didnt want to go any further into it and upset you by accident.

If your ever not sure how your feeling tune into Casper coz he always knows 😊

my brother had same result after a hospital stay last year and he still loves his smokes and coffees and wont take medication, its a shame i already know im probably not seeing him again i still enjoy the phone calls though so wish he tried a little bit. (not seeing him for reasons outside of this)

its good hearing you have a friend that knows the path your about to walk and can support you with what is going to help and save you confusion

Are there more tests required?

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@REDLINEZ750 Thankyou for thinking of me. I kept myself mostly busy today, went to the shops after my appointment and then sat down to work on my puzzle and had Casper cuddles.

Casper definitely always knows, he stays right by my side ❤️.

That's sad that your brother won't make any changes to help himself. I am glad you still enjoy the phone calls with him though.

Not sure about further tests yet, at the moment it's just recording my daily food intake for the next 2 weeks and then going from there.

In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

Hey @MissGremlin, sorry to hear about your recent blood test results.

There could still be time to turn it around and have your blood tests improve being in the “pre” stage? - fingers crossed! Sounds like you have a few good plans in place too. Awesome job re actively tackling it re plans with your GP!

I know the feeling though of blood tests going not the way you hoped. I have been struggling with autoimmune stuff that really decided to up it’s anti recently.

I know I struggle with the unknown and loss of control so know this will take a lot of adjusting to. I wonder if you feel the same?

You are strong enough to tackle this and you have beautiful Casper too who will help you through plus all of us on forum land as-well 🙏

sending positive vibes your way!! ☀️

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

Hello @Chasingsunsets, there's still time to hopefully either prevent or delay it. It's just incredibly scary for me especially cos I don't eat or drink much sugary things, don't eat takeaway other than subway or pizza very, very occasionally, don't drink alcohol or smoke and the food i do eat is usually healthy.

I'm sorry to hear about the autoimmune disease, hoping it settles down for you soon.

Yes it's definitely the same for me, i hate the unknown and the uncertainty of things. My brain just goes to worst case scenario and wants to fix everything immediately.

Thankyou, I'm glad to have this community of support ❤️

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